Inspiration, Dedication & Perspiration

Last training run...

2009-05-22T17:03:00.000-07:00

I am almost done writing a Thank you note to all my friends and family who have been supporting me and its off to the gym. Its Friday before the race, before the holiday, before the weekend. No one is at the office anymore and all my work is done.

It so strange to think this is the last training run? I had dinner with Hirono last night. She is so amazing. She is going to come with me to the Runner's expo on Sunday to pick up our bibs. She even mentioned that she might meet me along the race route and go a mile with me to encourage me. How could I be so blessed!!

On top of the fact that she bought dinner last night, she also got me a "post race" kit, replete with a full Bath & Body works splurge! Shea butter foot cream, foot scrub, loofah, mint spritz, sanitizing gel. Plus some great warnings about port-a-potties on the race track, what to bring with and what to leave behind and other awesome tidbits that were worrying me for not knowing.

I am recognizing so much of what these last 5 months has meant to me. I have made a lot of tough decisions. I haven't been as perfect as I would have liked to have been, but I am perfectly human. And this time, I am giving myself the grace to be just that- instead of punishing myself for not being SUPER human.

I am getting excited about Sunday. Still a little nervous, but I have had such an overwhelming amount of support its been so incredible. I think it has helped me get some perspective on what really matters. I am planning to stop by a fellow's house tonight. I am essentially saying good-bye.

He has been fighting a disease the entire time I have known him (almost 18 months) and he is not doing well. Liver transplant fell through and now he's dying. I wasn't best friend's with him or anything, but I have a real respect and love for him and I know now is the time, the last chance, to share that with him. I will definitely be thinking of him on Monday as I put one foot in front of the other and take the journey bravely, as he has.

God Bless you, Mark G!

Better than Ever!

2009-05-20T16:21:00.000-07:00

This is the last week. That's it. This week's training is three days of 3 miles and rest on Sat & Sun. Then Monday IS IT!

I already wrote about nerves in some of the previous entries. Today I am going to talk about accomplishments! First off, I am SO GLAD I bought the Nike+ and iPod at the start of this. If I hadn't had some outside system, tracking my initial start into this and where I am today, I don't think I would have believed it.

From when I began in January till today, I have accomplished:

50 workouts
248.76 miles
Average pace of 17.29 min/ mile

Today I did 3 miles in the gym. I looked back at the first time I attempted 3 miles in the gym and this is the difference.

Jan 14th: Total 3 .15 miles, Average Pace 17.5 min/ mile, Time approx 1 hr.- Mostly walking
May 20: Total 3.02 miles, Average Pace 14.43 min/ mile. Time 44 1/2 mins- Walking/jogging

Its quite incredible to see my improvements in a completely objective tool. I am really proud of myself. I have been through the agonizing over whether I would walk this, run this or what my time would be and all that stuff and what I know in my heart of hearts is that I JUST NEED TO FINISH. I CAN FINISH. I WILL FINISH.

I have let go of the limitations and know that if I can run, that's great! If I can't that's ok too. I am trying to not think about time- but I am only human. Right now, I am so satisfied it makes all the work feel worthwhile. Its the start of a whole new thing! Plus I found a local swimming pool, so I think that is next! I already got my waterproof ipod box!

"I can't lie... you got some nice curves"

2009-05-16T15:15:00.000-07:00

I came into this run with some major doubts. I was getting anxious about the race and telling myself I wasn't prepared enough. I hadn't RUN enough (of what I decided to walk). I was going to let myself down. I wouldn't finish. I hadn't even lost any weight during this!
That last one was when I stopped myself and recognized the irrationality of it all. I wrote about it. I reached out to a friend and I prayed that I would have the strength to put one foot in front of the other and just DO IT.
And that is exactly what I did. I took a trek down Huntington into El Sereno proper and explored part of the city I live in that I had never walked. And for the first time in two months- I ran. I probably ran a good 2/5ths of the whole 8.55 miles which was great. My knees aren't swollen now and I didn't overdo it- but I DID it. I tried.
I went up some hills I didn't expect, having never been in this side of the city, saw a run over kitty (poor kitty, god bless) and got hit on by someone who scared the crap out of me.
My primary goal was to find out where a neighborhood pool that a friend swims at, was located. I found a path online that would take this round trip (which could have been 3 miles) to 8miles (and ended up 8.55). It took me down Huntington to Eastern, then I went right and left again and cut down a little street parallel to Huntington called Navarro. I took that street as it wound around and ended up on Poplar, cutting into Alhambra. I alternated walking an running as I went and listened to NPR- Wait Wait Don't tell me. It was between 11am- 12pm.
I made a right on Orange Grove (not the one in Pasadena, but in Emery Park Track, in Alhambra) till it dead ended at Concord Ave. I turned right on Concord Ave and followed it to Alhambra Rd. That turn to Alhambra road is where I saw the kitty. It was orange like my Kiki but still and sadly killed in the cross walk.
This part of Alhambra is very industrial, lots of big warehouses, muffler shops and auto body/ paint places. The traffic was flowing fast. I took every opportunity going downhill to jog. I saw the sign for Lombardy and knew I would be taking a right on that street. I had never been here before- not even driving. I turned the corner and started going up a hill I didn't expect. I guess I should have expected hills- I mean it is my neighborhood- even if its a part I have never visited. I slowed down a little going up the hill, but made it to the top and continued on Lombardy as it went back down on the other side. I looked up and saw the back of the hillside I normally see across the Huntington Dr. valley from my house. I had never seen the back of it before!
The road curved around and ended at Eastern. I realized if I went to the right, I could come right back to Huntington where I first turned. If I went to the left, I could find the El Sereno Recreation Center where the pool was at. I went to the left and crossed the street. There was a big Elementary School there on Eastern and a a large baseball field with about 4-5 diamonds next to it. That was part of the Rec Center. I have a friend who lives in El Sereno and goes to Wilson High who is an Umpire. I bet that is where he works! I kept looking out at all the games to see if he was there- but it was mostly girls softball and no sign of my friend.
At the corner of the fields I made a right and started going up (yes- uphill again) Klamath Place. Right above the fields was the center. I guess I expected something different. I didnt see a swimming pool, so I walked up and found the doors, and grabbed a schedule of hours. Then I walked around the building and realized it was an indoor pool with sliding panels that can be opened to the outside. I guess that's a good thing for laps- to not be outside- though I guess I wont get a tan as a byproduct of laps there. Ha!
I left the pool and continued up Klamath Place to Richlieu and took a left. At this point its getting really hot. I keep expecting there to be more shade on the streets, but its like there are no trees? At least none that are giving off shade. I make it to the end of the street and turn left on Druid. This whole time I have been consulting a little piece of paper which I wrote some brief directions on. Its a strange feeling not knowing where I am going or what the terrain is like- but nice to know that the directions have all been accurate.
Druid ends up being a big hill too. I am huffing and puffing as I go up, slowing down a little and breathing out loud. I keep saying- and start saying it out loud- "I can do this, I am doing this, I did it." I had my hands on my hips and felt the pull in my right hip as I went up, but I kept going. I reached the top and the street became Multnomah. I looked to the left and there was a beautiful High School that was reminiscent of LA in the 60's. Had a very "modern" feel for that era. Was probably 3-4 stories tall and lots of trees. I think this is where my friend goes to school and i have another friend who subs there. I know this street connects to Soto and I have driven by it a bunch in the past but never taken it.
I start going back down Multnomah and take turns jogging and walking. I notice "Ascot Hills" entrance and think that must have been where the Asoct Raceway used to be. Where Cary Grant used to race cars in the El Sereno Valley back in the 40's. I keep going down the hill and see the big warehouses on Soto ahead. I see the three radio towers that sit on the back of the hill across the valley from my house. They seem so much lower up close. I thought they were on the top of the mountain!
I get to Soto and instead of going to the right and heading home, I decide to go left and cut over to Lincoln Park. After all, I am only at 6.5 miles right now and need to be at 8miles to finish my workout. Its about 1pm now and Offramp has just finished on NPR. This American Life is just beginning.
I am walking on the left side of Soto, on a tiny piece of sidewalk along an arid hillside of dirt. there not much room on the sidewalk and I think I hear (out of the left ear without the headphone in) someone behind me. I take a quick look when I hear the crackling of dry brush and notice someone. I figure he wants to walk past me, so I go to the right side of the sidewalk and start walking faster. My head is bouncing a little between fear of having someone attack me- that "dark-alley-someone-following-you" feeling and the feeling of some lone runner passing you on the road.
All of a sudden I head someone say "Hi" on my right side (the side with the earphone) and I just about jump out of my skin. "ARGH!- You scared the hell out of me. I have in an earphone."
"Oh sorry. Hi- how are you doing?", he says.
"I'm fine", I say- wondering what this person wants and still not sure I WON'T get attacked. He's not the most unassuming person. He is about 5'11, heavy-ish, wearing a MISFITS t-shirt and shorts that don't look like they are intended for jogging, since he is pulling them up as he walks. He has a little bit of a moustache coming in and black hair with acne scars. He looks like he could eaither be nice or menacing. I am nervous because there are no other people walking on this street and only the occasional car. And I don't know what he wants. My initial thought when he said "hi" was to scream "NOOOOOOOOOOOOO"- kick him in the balls and run. But I wasn't even sure if I had that energy.
"I saw you walking and I was walking too, so I thought we could walk together." He says
"Oh. A... Ok" I am still feeling uncomfortable. The whole scene doesn't really add up.
"What's your name?"
I debate whether I should tell him my real name. I remind myself I am supposed to be honest and that will protect me, so I say "Noelle. What's yours?"
"Eric. Do you stay around here?" There it is, feels like he's trying to pick up on me.
"Sort of. I'm training for the LA Marathon so I am getting miles in." I say shortly.
"Yea- I am gonna do one of those sometime."
"Do you live nearby?" I am not sure if I should even be asking anything or carrying on a conversation. Part of me thinks I should just ignore him and be a bitch. The other part of me is afraid if I do that, it might set him off an he might attack me.
"Yea I live close by. Do you do this often?" Starts to feel like he's picking up on me again.
"About 3-4 times during this training. You?"
"Yea- like 2-3x a week. But sometimes I get lazy and don't do it. You know."
I am still feeling uncomfortable so I take a shot at a different tactic. "This is the part where I run." I take off running down the side of Soto toward Valley. A bit to my surprise, he is running alongside me. I have a flash in my head that if only I hadn't done 6.5 miles already I would have more energy to run faster and out run him, instead of him staying close. I slow down as I reach Valley. I just can't run anymore and I say "I'm going this way to the park" He slows down and follows along.
The he continues, "So what do you do?"
"I work in Burbank. So I drive a lot. What about you?"
"I work at UPS close by." he says
"Sounds like a good job. How long have you done that?" I say. Thinking, maybe there's an opening coming to tell him I am not interested?
"Yea its good. I've been there 7 years. Even with the economy, we haven't really lost jobs. I mean, just some new people got laid off. but everyone is still shipping things."
"Yeah- my husband applied for a job there. It was during the holidays, but i guess they had enough people at the time. Seems like a good job." THERE IT IS. I got my in to drop the whole 'I'm married' thing. I could see he was looking a little disappointed. But it didn't seem to stop him entirely. It was like shooting a bear in the shoulder. It wasn't a kill shot, he was just slowed down.
"So do you have kids at home?"
"Nope. Just kitties. But I like watching all the parties here in the park." We had finally arrived at Lincoln Park and there were lots of people/ witnesses. At this point, I was less concerned that I would be attacked- but still had my sensors up.
"Look, I can't lie. I like you. You got some nice curves. That's why I came up to you."
"Thank you. That's very nice."
"No I'm serious. I mean it."
"Thank you. I appreciate it. But I am happily married."
"Yeah. Ok." The kill shot.
"Listen. I am going to cut through the park now." I looked at him and made sure he knew that wasn't an invitation, but that i was going to leave. I wasn't interested.
He says "Ok".
"Have a nice day, Eric"
And I started to run. I knew I had made it out of that. I didn't have enough energy to run for a long time, but still had some adrenaline. So I went for as long as I could with my head reeling. This situation brought up so many feeling I have about my body. While it was nice to get the compliment. And even nicer that it was from someone who, looking back, I could imagine being a guy in High School who was not a serial rapist, but probably stayed home playing video games. He was probably kind of shy. I am glad I didn't try the "bitch" mode- he didn't deserve that. instead I was honest and nice. That was good. I walked through the fear and think I was successful in the end.
I went through the park and over to Mission. I walked the usual route back up Mission, past Broadway and to Turquoise. Up the street till it became Pyrites and to my doorstep. I stopped the Nike+ workout and saw I had actually gone 8.55 miles. By running a little bit at a time, I had increased my overall average pace from 17.3min mile to a 16.25 min mile. I peeled off my gear and ran a cold bath and cleaned up, tried to "de-swell" my hands, and checked my knees. A little swelling there- but no real heat rash to speak of. I think that only happens when I go 9 miles or more. The powder def helped again.
After my shower, I started thinking about this run and the interaction with Eric. It made me realize some of the fear I have with my body. I want attention, but I don't want the "unwanted attention". And now that I am married, what is the difference between that wanted/ unwanted attention? The fact that I don't wear tight shirts, because I am afraid someone will stare at me and maybe attack me, is real. Its part of the reason I have never been able to loose the weight I need to. Because I am afraid to do it. Afraid to loose my "armour". My "fat suit".
Maybe dealing with this today- walking/ jogging out unscathed- not being the jerk and getting a nice compliment in the end, is a sign that I might be ready to make the change. To loose weight and be the woman I know I am inside. To not be afraid of how beautiful I might be inside. To not be afraid of the reaction I will get. I am feeling like, if I can finish this marathon, anything is possible and the world is just opening for me.

Doubts creeping in...

2009-05-16T10:40:00.000-07:00

i had decided back at the end of march I was gonna train to walk this thing. i know there must be other people walking as well for their own reasons. but as I draw closer to the date of the event, I am getting nervous. i don't know if I am self sabotaging or what- but without having ever done an event like this (or any running event) i am starting to feel unprepared? I am so glad i had the Nike + stats showing me that I have accrued 237 miles leading up to this so far and I am on my way out to do 8 right now. But its getting scary.
i was reading the la marathon instructions and they are talking about the 13+ min pacers- and my fastest average pace is 17 min mile. i guess I just don't want to miss out, or not get my time recorded or something . i want to make sure it feels like it was worth all the work i did or something. i am trying to be brave- but have to admit- as it gets closer i am having those negative feelings creep in, like i might not make it and it will be all for nothing... and i know this has been about the journey and not the end- but now as I reach the end- it feels like it is about the end. and I know i am not mad that Hirono wont be there with me- but today I am feeling very alone in this. i don't even know what to tell people who want to be there for me on the track! I am afraid i wont be part of the whole excitement at all! and even though i feel like i want the whole world cheering for me, there is a part of me that wants to isolate and tell no one to come, in case i fail. or because i don't want them to be bothered since i will take forever to finish. i guess i am just feeling less than... is this normal?
i guess i need to just put one foot in front of the other and get out there today. "i am a marathoner" i know where i am right now. that is the only place i can be. hopefully by the end of my 8 miles today I will really feel that way.

What would you do for a Pinkberry Green Tea frozen yogurt?

2009-05-09T23:06:00.000-07:00

... walk to Little Tokyo, of course!

We recently discovered the Pinkberry in Little Tokyo following sushi at Tenno. This is part of the recently re-instated Date Night Friday's. Turns out Pinkberry (which I had been hearing about for a couple years now, but was waiting for the hype to die down) is situated on 2nd street around the corner from Tenno. I figured the green tea yogurt there was going to be about average- but to my surprise it is worth the hype! So now I am a fan. It only figures that when planning my walk for today- which was 9 miles- Pinkberry would cross my mind! I had been wondering how far downtown really was from where I lived now, in El Sereno, so I decided to map it out and then walk it.

My training is starting to wind down as I approach the final 2 weeks before the marathon. Gone are the LONG ASS walks that exceed 16 miles and in are the smaller jaunts that I tell ya- feel SO MUCH easier than they did at the start of this whole escapade. I was shocked that 9 miles felt as good as it did!

Before I get into how I managed to not only survive, but enjoy a 9 mile walk, let me tell you my route. I walked down the hill from from house to Mission. I took a right on Broadway and went over the hill into Lincoln Heights, passing Lincoln High School and all the small shops on Broadway. I drive past these shops everyday, but there is a different feel to walking it. I feel more a part of it on foot. Especially walking past the Korean/ Chinese Temples - since it was Sat and that is their "Farmer's Market" day. The smells of fish and over ripe fruit, was intense and the language was disorienting, but exciting. Less than a block from there I was walking past a Latino record store pumping Ranchero music and advertising "discos mas barato"! Its a common culture class in my neighborhood.

I kept walking down Broadway- past the 5 fwy and jaunted across Pasadena Ave to the upper section of Broadway. The view of downtown from this little bridge is awesome. I was above the Metro tracks and the Cornfield Park. The backside of Elysian Park was on my right and I was headed into Chinatown.

I started to hear drums as I walked closer to the Cornfields. This is a park that became a park in the last 8 years. It used to be a big open field that houses several homeless people who squeezed through, over or under the fence that locked other people out. It used to be that there were more shopping carts in that field than at the closest grocery store. I guess back in the 20's or 40's the land was dedicated to growing corn- hence its name. Well in the last 8 years they "cleaned it up" and put a few patches or grass, some benches and a sign in front of it that said it was a CA State park. They also started having events, security and paying people come to the park. I have seen an adult circus (Cirque Beserk) perform there myself.

Today was no different. There were big tented booths out, ready to make a buck and a cool looking tee pee. As I got closer, the drums got louder and I started to notice the people playing the drums were also chanting and in traditional Native American Garb. I walked past a painted sign that said POW WOW. I tried to record some of the drums on my phone- but the quality was bad- oh well. My memory recorded it.

I kept walking on Broadway and entered Chinatown. I walked through Chinatown, past all types of people who were there for Dim Sum, good deals on Chinese imports or just grabbing things from the Fish markets. The street was more crowded than I expected, with store owners hanging their wares outside for people to check out. There was one store I walked by the glistened in the light- rad iating gold from ever item. It was like a magic store.

I saw a marker for "Little Italy" but nothing there that was still open or working to represent it. It was all Chinatown now.

I kept walking till I reached the gates of Chinatown, with the two dragons. A symbol I had driven under several times in my life. I cut down Cesar Chavez to Spring street and walked across the 101 Fwy. This overpass has been used when photographing the LA Fwys in almost every movie you see it in. I think my impression of what LA fwys would be like was created from that overpass. The traffic was unusually light for a Sat mid-day. I could see the new Cathedral to the right and the cool mural art on the fwy to my left. I kept going down Spring street and passed City Hall and the Courthouse where everyone goes for Jury Duty. Then I passed the new Police Station and turned left on 2nd street. I was in Little Tokyo.

I took a look at my Nike+ to see how many miles I actually went to arrive at the door of Pinkberry before I paused the w orkout. 4.88 miles/ 1hr and 17mins. Woo hoo! Half way done and at my half way point!

I paused my workout and walked into the cool storefront. I ordered a small green team yogurt to go. The guy behind the counter must have seen my power pack with Gatorade and my sweaty brow when he said "to go huh? do you want an ice pack?" I was like "you can do that? SURE! I have a long walk back still!"

I quickly took this break to update my Facebook status: "Noelle walked 4.88 miles to Pinkberry in Little Tokyo. Yes... Its that good." Moments later my name was called and I was handed a little bag which included a big ziploc filled with ice! Yes! The stop was less than 5 mins and I was back on the road.

I continued down 2nd street to San Pedro and cut over to 1st street- right in front of the Japanese American Museum. I crossed Alameda and went up and over the 1st street bridge. This bridge means a lot to me. I used to live in a loft right next to the bridge from 1998-2000 with my husband before we got married. We've taken band photos on this bridge. The train station under the bridge was where two of our cats were born and rescued from. I have a lot of history here. And now that history is changing. The loft we lived in has been demolished. The loft building itself has been cut in half. The band is not together anymore and the cats are happily El Sereno cats now. Plus they are expanding the bridge so that the Metro train can run from East LA into downtown. This is a whole new bridge and a whole new experience with it.

I walked on the tracks on the bridge- because I knew this might be the only time I would get to do it. Once construction is done, there will be a train on those tracks!

I made it across and hung a left onto Mission, pass the "Projects of Beverly Hills" the El Pato Hot Sauce plant and under the 101 Fwy this time. I continued on Mission past the glass repair places (where we took my old Toyota when the back windshield was broken back in '99. Someone had thrown a big rock from the bridge into the car- we suspected it was someone from the glass repair shops), past the USC County General Hospital (where my husband once went for a cancer biopsy when we were broke back in '00) and past Lincoln Heights DMV and Park. I was in the home stretch. I was starting to feel more fatigues, so I chewed on some Powerbar gummies and drank the rest of my Gatorade.

I started carrying my Pinkberry from the bottom of the bag so my swollen hands had the ice right on them. That felt really good. My feet weren't feeling numb like they had on the long runs and my knees weren't hurting too much either. I could tell I had some rash starting- but was excited that I was almost home.

I passed by the Macy's furniture showroom, then by Broadway and finally to Turquoise street where I ascended my last hill (which is always the hardest) and finally arrived at home. I think I had gotten concerned about my pace along the 2nd half of the walk. There was part of me that was thinking about past walks and how long they had taken. I wanted to make sure this didn't take me 3 hrs- because then my pace would have dropped. But overall I kept my pace pretty steady- 17.10 min/ mile and finished 9.11 miles in 2hrs & 36 mins. I walked in at 3pm.

I chugged a bunch of cold water, put the Pinkberry in the freezer, climbed in the showed, was pleasantly surprised that i barely had a rash on the back of my right knee and then I sat around in a towel after the shower for about an hour, enjoying the breeze from the back door of the house and watching the cats. I didn't even dig into the Pinkberry till 4:30p because the walk itself was satisfying enough.

Walking Blind & Seeing More than I Expected

2009-05-02T22:20:00.000-07:00

Last night when I was thinking about this walk and where I should be going I was stumped! I have been walking around so many parts of my neighborhood, Alhambra, Pasadena, etc- I felt like I had covered a lot of ground in the 200+ miles I have done since the start of this training. Trying to plot out 18 miles without a lot of repeat was getting tough! So when I went out there today, I kind of winged it.

So I tried tabulating it in my head: I knew there was a part of the Ernest E. Debbs park that I hadn't walked yet and its right by my house- that might be an extra mile, and if I walked over to the Rose bowl that might be 4 miles and maybe I could walk across Colorado and down to Huntington. That should get me to about 9 miles and then I could head home.

It was a nice morning, not too hot, with some cloud cover. It was the perfect day for a long walk. I had bought some "Body Glide" at the store per a friend's suggestion. I have been trying all kinds of things to combat the rash I seem to keep getting under my knee braces. So I rubbed that stuff all over my knees and calves, then slid on my clean lycra capris and the knee braces over that. I velcroed them in and grabbed my "power pack" and loaded the usual- including Power Bar gels, Power bar gummies, Thirst Quench gum and a couple of frozen Gatorades (20 oz). I put my phone, iPod, money, ID and ATM card in there with my handkerchief.

I had been getting a little bored with the same play list for the last three weekend long walks so I tried to find Podcasts of This American Life - one of my favorite NPR shows to hear on the walk. Unfortunately, my iTunes was having trouble connecting to the store. I remembered that my husband's Sony mp3 player had an FM tuner, so I asked him before he headed to Camarillo if I could borrow it. Now I had an extra electric device in my power pack- you'd think I was headed to a desert island!

I felt the house at 10:30am and headed toward the park. It has been a while since I walked the neighborhood hills. I normally go straight to Huntington, this time is was uphill for more than 1.5 miles and I was already hurting by the time I got to the hiking path into the park. It was beautiful, though. This was the start of my walk feeling like a hike. I really like hikes!

I walked up the hill into the park and onto the first plateau. Then across the parking lot to the section of the park I had never been. I had attempted it once a couple years before- but when I realized it was all uphill I had quit before. This time I found myself chanting- I can do this, I am doing this, I will do this. I knew the only way I wouldn't make it up the steep hill is if I stopped. And as long as I could put one foot in front of the other- no matter how slow it was- I could make it up. I counted about 10 lizards as I made it across the park and up this slope. I finally reached a plateau and saw two different directions, so I started one way and realized they connected around a little mound. Behind the mound was a LAKE!

That's right, a LAKE! At the top of Monterey Hill in Ernest E. Debbs park is a LAKE that overlooks downtown, Mount Washington, Highland Park and Hermon from different sides. It was like a little oasis! I had no idea there would be a naturally occurring body of water on top of this hill, much less that other people would be there, trying to fish! Its amazing the places people in LA try to fish. I have seen quite a few on these walks, now, too.

It took me about an hour to get to this point and I decided to switch to the radio from my normally music. Luckily I had locked controls on the iPod, so it looked like my Nike+ would cooperate with my and track everything today without pausing or ending the workout. I tuned the radio to KPCC and heard "Wait- Wait Don't Tell Me" as I continued up the mountain side.

The one thing I was afraid of, when listening to talking instead of beats, was that I would slow down. I actually picked up my pace according to the Nike+! It must have been because I because so engaged in what I was hearing. I kept one ear bud in and the other out to hear the world. I felt so curious, walking down paths I would never have taken, just to see where they went. After all, I knew I needed to accumulate miles and so walking up a trail and back down to explore it was a good way to add to the tally.

I took the trail all the way over the mountain and down the other side, which dropped me right next to the 110 FWY by Via Marisol. I crossed the street and walked by the tennis courts and park I normally drive past and under the overpass. The new dog park that I see whenever I get onto the 110 Fwy at Ave 60 was right there! I found out how to get to it by exploring!

I also had been noticing the new bike path along the 110 fwy and was able to get onto it from where I was and walk in the cement waterway that (I think) becomes the Arroyo! Its amazing how fearless I felt walking down paths I had never tread alone. I felt like a great explorer, finding things I have only seen from the road. The path ended at Pasadena Ave- which I crossed and then found a little dirt path behind the bus stop.

Turns out that path took me into the official Arroyo Seco Park in South Pasadena. I walked up and down and noted the signs which had pics of the wildlife and wildflowers as I listened to "Off Ramp" on the radio. I continued down the narrow path as it went into the trees and notices the Arroyo golf course come up on the left side. I passed by a few other walkers and knew it was a safe place to be. Walking next to the golf course I immediately thought back to walking in Nebraska/ Iowa and the golf course there. It was so yellow there and so green and lush here. It was nice to be home.

As I came out in the clearing I notices some rocks on the side of the hill. I walked over to them and realized that they were the rocks on the side of the 110 FWY that say "City of South Pasadena"! This was a major road marker for me! The first time I saw that I was in college and I remember thinking how cool it was. This was the first time I had ever taken the 110FWY and went into Old Town Pasadena with my friend Anel to get our hair done. I always wondered how someone could get to those rocks and here I was!

I continued on the path and it dropped me out at the South Pasadena Little League fields I had walked by on my first 16 miler. There were little kid teams playing and it was adorable. I had forgotten how coaches would pair kids up at certain bases and have them play as buddies. The adult was pitching and the little one at the plate was doing his best to hit to the 4 left fielders. It really took me back to my little league time. What a gorgeous spring day to be playing ball.

At this point I had finished 1.25 Gatorades and so I stopped by the bathroom. I had gotten 7.5 miles in at this point. On the way out I tried to cool my hands in the faucet and fill one of the Gatorade bottles with drinking water. I had been walking for a little more than 2 hrs at this point, so I opened up a powerbar gel and knocked that back too.

I walked up Arroyo Dr. past the stables and onto one of my favorite streets in Pasadena. Walking the tree lined street on the dirt side, I looked down into the Arroyo and noted all the trees growing sideways juxtaposed with the multi-million dollar homes. "This American Life" came on the radio and I was like- YES! I forgot that was on the radio today! This was what I spent an hour trying to download before I left and its actually ON LIVE! What good fortune!

"This American Life" carried me down Arroyo all the way to the Rose Bowl. I walked past the Aquatic Center, where I have spent the majority of my time when here before. This time I walked across the baseball fields and over to the KidSpace Museum. Then I walked to the actual Rose Bowl and saw other runners/ walkers and felt like I was at home. I had never walked around the Rose Bowl before, so I decided to do it now. I was already at 10 miles, but I figured it wasn't that far around, so it would be fine! Besides, I was caught up in the last story on the radio, so I just kept going.

The field in front of the Rose Bowl had more soccer teams, in their bright uniforms, than I have ever seen in one place. Crossing the street I intercepted 4 balls and sent them back across the busy street to their games/ practices before I got into the Pedestrian lane on the road. I followed the people ahead of me as "The Splendid Table" came on the radio.

I guess I didn't realize the path around the Rose Bowl went around Brookside Golf Course, too? So it was a longer circumference than I had originally planned. By the time I heard the story on vegan soul food, a woman who was reborn at the Farmer's market and the Cheese monger from Brooklyn talk about washed rind cheese, I had already gone 3 miles! I decided it was ok if I didn't go all the way to where I began my trip around and cut back down the road by the Aquatic center and start to head home. I was already at 13.75 miles!

My feet were starting to hurt and I realized after I began walking up along Holly street back to Orange Grove, that I didn't use the bathroom at the Rose Bowl like I should have. I had made it through most of the rest of my Gatorade and some of the water at this point. I had had another powerbar gel and some gummies and some gum. "Prairie Home Companion" had just begun when I hit 14 miles.

I was starting to plot out how I would get home and avoid too many more hills. My legs were starting to hurt and I could tell already I was going to have a rash/burn/hot spot under my knee braces. I tried to just put it out of my head, since there was nothing I could do about it now. I decided the shortest route was going to be the best one, even if I had to take some hills. I went all the way down Orange Grove to Mission, Mission to Indiana and Indiana to Monterey.

I looked at my iPod as I walked on Monterey toward Foremost Liquor, where the Metro tracks cross.- I was at 18 miles. That was supposed to be the whole walk. And here I was- still 2 BIG hills and what I thought would be 2 miles away from my house! The good news was I was at about 5hrs 15mins at this stage- so my pace was working for me. The bad news was no one was there to pick me up! Last week I knew I wasn't going to be a hero and was going to call for a ride when I hit 18 miles. Well I called. But he was still in Camarillo when I called- which is over 1 hr away. So I told him I loved him and thanked him for the loan of the FM player. I told him I'd see him at home, one way or another.

After I hung up, I looked ahead and said to myself, "Time doesn't matter. Just get home. No matter how long it takes. The only way it wont happen is if you stop moving." And so I walked.

I walked over the hill on Monterey (the one that back in Jan I never would have imagined taking by foot) and while I slowed down a bit, I made it! I kept chanting "I can do this, I will do this, I am doing this!"

By the time I got over the 1st hill, the NPR news was coming on. It was 5pm. I was at 20 miles. Still not home. I kept going.

I walked down Monterey and around the corner to Huntington. My feet were feeling numb and my legs heavy. I had to go pee pretty badly and didn't have any more water/ Gatorade. I wanted to drink more, but had nothing. I wanted to eat something, but managed to subside that with the gummies.

I finally made it to little Huntington drive- home was within range- just half a mile. I kept pushing on through the neighborhood to the school by my house. Last big hill. Push Push Push, I made it up and then the rest was cake. My feet kept going. My breath kept going and I arrived home at 5:30pm. Completed 21.5 miles.

When I got home I ran to the bathroom to pee and started peeling off layers. I was right about the rash/burn. It was worse than any previous weeks. Just touching it felt hot and scraped. The one thing the 'Body Glide' did manage to do is let all the dirt I had kicked up stick to my knees. I looked bruised even more than I was because of all the dirt stuck to my feet, knees and calves.

After my shower tonight, I dove into leftover sushi from date night (last night) and some left over chicken soup my husband made. I tried to stretch, as much as I could without touching my burnt calves. I rubbed all kinds of Diaper rash cream on and I felt content. My feet didn't fall off.

Even though I started this trek blind (hence the extra 3.5 miles I ended up doing) I felt like I got to open my eyes to areas I had never seen before. I am loving this quenching of curiosity that I get to do on every walk. I am so proud that I have given myself this time and I am not giving up on myself. Just think! I went 21.5 miles today. That is less than 5 miles away from the whole marathon total!! I CAN DO THIS!! Less than one month to go!

18 miles and an escape plan!

2009-04-26T22:42:00.001-07:00

One of the great things about this training is that I have had the chance to explore areas on foot that I have only driven, areas I never thought I would go and areas that seemed insurmountable. In preparing for my planned 18 miles this weekend, I tried to find a course that would be beautiful and have plenty of pit stops, if needed.

I was helping some friends out with a Garage sale in Pasadena (near the foothills off Altadena- just North of 110) on Sat. I knew I wouldn't be able to come back and work on Sunday but thought, wouldn't it be cool to walk back up and check in! On top of that, my good friend Gabriel lives nearby and when he stopped by the sale on Sat, he said that he would join me for a mile or so if I did come back by the next day.

So I took a look at Google Maps and found that from my house to the garage sale was approx 9.2 miles. If I added in walking down the street to my friend Gabriel’s house, that added in an extra 0.5miles or so. This plan was starting to make me nervous. I had never done 18 miles before and definitely didn’t want to plan to do more my first time. Then my husband said he would be around that afternoon and I could call him to pick me up if I needed. I thought- What a great idea! Granted, I didn’t want to give myself the option of calling him before I hit 18 miles- but having that freedom meant I could go where I wanted and call him when I needed. What a gift!

Originally he had offered to go part of the way with me- but suggested I find a route that was a figure 8- so he could walk part way and then be dropped back off at home while I continued. There really aren’t that many places around my house I still want to explore- so the figure 8 idea - while well intentioned- wasn’t gonna fly for me today.

For some reason it takes me forever to get ready to walk. I always have the best intentions of leaving before 9am- but between putting on my gear (this time I forgot to powder under the lycra pants that I wore under my knee braces), packing my "power pack" (I was told it wasn’t a "fanny pack" since a.- I don’t wear it on my back. I wear it on my tummy and b.- it has bottle holders with insulation to keep them cold. It is MUCH more than a fanny pack) and stretching. I get so distracted as I am getting ready with all the things I feel like I need to do. I will have to make sure I pack up my power pack and layout my stuff before the marathon or I will be late to the starting line!

So I got out the door at 10 mins to 10am. And what a gorgeous day to be walking! The sun was out, but not too hot, there was a slight breeze and I was feeling fine! I took Huntington Drive all the way down to Sierra Madre/ San Marino Dr. At this point I had drank a little of my Gatorade (which I remembered to freeze the night before!). On the corner there is a BofA and I had a check with me I needed to deposit, so I paused my Nike Plus and stretched out my calves while at the ATM.

I guess its just Murphy's Law that every time I pause my Nike+ it stops my whole workout. I think its real progress that I don't freak out anymore. Before I would be upset at my Nike+ and think my whole workout was ruined, because my Mini me would not reflect the total number of miles I woudl actually complete, etc. Now, I just take it in stride (all puns intended) and start a new workout, so as to not have too long of a pause between them. Then I add up the totals at the end for my own edification. This was at 6.5 miles.

I continued up San Marino/ Sierra Madre towards the foothills. There really isnt any sidewalk on that street, so I went into the wide grassy median and walked in the middle of the road, beneth the trees, looking out for dog poop. It was getting warmer now, it was after noon and I knew I was getting closer to my destination: Garage Sale central. I was also feeling like I might need to go pee.

I hadn’t drank a lot of Gatorade yet, but I did have 8oz of "Joint Juice"- which is my Glucosamine supplement- before I left and it was catching up to me. I made it to Colorado, then Walnut and realized my Chiropractor's office was right there. I had the code for his office park door and knew there was a bathroom inside, so I went there. Incidentally- it is 8.7 miles to my Chiropractor from home (in case I ever wanted to walk there again).

Leaving my Chiropractor's I continued up Altadena. I was in the home stretch. Soon I would be seeing friends (as if at a finish line) selling their wares at the garage sale, and walk up triumphantly! I texted my friend Gabriel who was going to meet me nearby when I crossed the intersection of Altadena and Paloma. He says "Stop at Paloma, I am almost there". I write back "I don’t want to stop where are you at?" He texts, "Call me" so I do. I turn around and walk back down Paloma and see a figure walking toward me with a dog.

I meet up with Gabriel and Nikko and double back up the street and arrive at the Garage sale which is incredibly quiet... actually its done. Its put away. The car is in the driveway. I am too late to get kudos and accolades from my friends. Well it is 1:10p. 10.5 miles.

I walk up to the door and knock and the organizers are in there counting money. They congratulate me on the distance I came just to check in on them and thank me for the time I spent yesterday selling. I feel good :)

So I go back out and walk with Gabriel to his house, sit down for a couple mins, he gives me some of his left over "Accel Gel" and we sit for about 15 mins and drink some water. Its nice to rest for a moment. I don't think the walk would have been half as enjoyable without knowing the rest time was coming and enjoying the shade of the back porch, some cold water and time with my friend.

He leashes his other dog, Hannah and we say goodbye to his partner and head back out, towards home. He catches me up on all the latest, come cool séance work he has been doing at the Pasadena Playhouse, the drama of Paranormal investigation and tells me the best houses to look at in Pasadena are on San Pasqual (one of his 3 favorite streets in Pasadena).

We walk south, out of the foothills, past Colorado, past Del Mar to San Pasqual. I hug my friend and pet Hannah to say goodbye and continue the rest of my journey alone. San Pasqual doesn’t disappoint. It is a beautiful street, lots of trees, wide road, amazing homes with beautiful details. The type of neighborhood I never think I could afford, but love to visit. I admire the other families walking by and the open house- trying to get a glimpse without actually going in.

The street ends at Hill, right at the Cal Tech campus. I have never been to Cal Tech and really haven’t been on a college campus in a long time. I forgot how independent they make me feel. How quiet they are with nature the only interruption of people studying. There is a serenity here that I didn’t expect existed in the middle of this city. It feels like this is the birth of science here.

Since I have never been, I am little afraid I will hit a border on campus and not be able to get out, so when I see cars passing, I head to that street. Its is California. At this point I have had my first Powerbar Gel. I was starting to feel a little hungry, tired, kind of worn down and had already eaten my power bar "gummy" gels. Those are great- not quite as much as the gel packets- but just enough to feel like I am doing something for the fatigue.

I took California all the way east, past Pie and Burger on Lake, past Euclid, Marengo and then turned left and headed down Arroyo Parkway. Now at this point I am starting to watch my mile count. I know that to get all the way back home would take me FAR more than 18 miles. I don’t want to be a hero today. Besides, my husband said I could call and he would pick me up if I reached a point where I couldn’t go on.

I began thinking about eating- I was getting hungry as I walked down Arroyo Pkwy. What if I was able to hit 18 miles, at a sushi restaurant, then call my husband and have him meet me there and have a late lunch! That would be perfect! I passed by one on Arroyo- 16.7 miles… What about the one on Fair Oaks? – 17.2 miles! Dammit! This plan wasn’t going to work. So I kept pushing on, consuming another powerbar gel to take away the hunger and what I knew would be an impending headache if I didn’t.

I took Fair Oaks to Monterey and then took Fremont to Huntington. I got myself on the left side of the road as I walked back, planning for my pick up. I was almost at 18 miles as I passed the Starbucks. Soon I would approach the $0.99 cent store. I looked at my iPod and say- 18 miles (once I added the 11.5 showing to the 6.5 I had got earlier). I grabbed my phone and texted Gabriel- “I DID IT and now I am calling my husband.” I called him and said, “I am on Huntington, on your side of the road. Please come get me! J” And I kept walking.

Ultimately I did 18.75 miles by the time I climbed into his truck on the side of the road. He took me home and I unraveled my gear and found I had achieved a MAJOR rash on both calves and behind my knee, this time. (Not sure why- though the lycra pants weren’t fresh and clean like last time and I did forget the powder.) I think this is heat rash, but I am not sure of that either. My legs are incredibly sore now, but I did the best stretch I could and plan to do another before I go to bed.

I got in the shower, cleaned up, and rewarded my efforts with a drive to Little Toyko (downtown) and a sushi feast. Good protein and carbs. Healthy and delicious. Plus I felt I earned the hell out of it.

The times, they are a changin'

2009-04-20T16:58:00.000-07:00

I just found out today that Hirono is not going to be doing the marathon. Its bad enough I don't see her at work everyday now, but now- not even the marathon to look forward to with her!

This brings on mixed feeling for me. I totally respect her decision- she hadn't been able to get her training rolling and she always told me- you get out of it, what you put into it. She did her last marathon in Oct- which was not that long ago. She wasn't able to do the Pasadena Half- because she was sick. But there's another part of me that's a little disappointed. I didn't originally get into this to do it alone. I thought it would be great to have a buddy. Even though I admit, I thought I might drag her down since I am walking and not running, but knowing she was going to be there was also exciting.

All in all, there was something inside me that kind of knew this might happen. Call it instinct, call it divine light... I think its all about accepting things being the way they are supposed to be at this moment in time. I have been doing the majority of this training alone. I have been finding more strength in myself to make tough decisions that are about my personal independence and letting go of interdependence and enmeshment. It had been a journey in finding my way, my strength and my peace as I got through these extraordinary circumstances. It has been finding time for ME- to take care of ME- while still taking care of others, the right way.

I know Hirono will be with me during the race, even if it is just in spirit. She is the one who opened this door for me. But I am definitely the one who is power-walking her way through it.

God Bless you Hirono and Thank you for everything.

17 miles in 90 degree heat

2009-04-19T17:15:00.000-07:00

I was really excited and gung-ho about this walk today. I knew I got up a little later than I had wanted. I knew it the first min I stepped outside and felt like it was already 80 degrees at 10:45am. But I felt prepared. I had slathered on sunblock all over my uncovered skin. My hair has become long enough to pull back in a ponytail and leave off the do'rag. I had just received my new hi-tech fanny pack from eBay, so I had a place for my cell phone, ID, money, iPod, AND two water bottle holders for my Gatorade! I wore a pair of Lycra leggings under my knee braces with powder under them- to combat the continuing heat rash issue. I was freaking ready to rock!

I mapped out the route I would take this weekend last night. I decided I would head to Griffith Park. When I looked online, getting to the tennis courts on Riverside was only 7 miles, but if I went into the park a little ways, I could reach 8 miles and then turn it around to complete my planned 16 miler.

I started out walking down Mission to Broadway and took that big hill up and over to Lincoln Height HS. I could see downtown skyline to my right as I cruised down the rest of the street. I was already noticing it getting hotter, so I started re-planning my route based on where I could find shade. I didn't want to crap out early or drink all my Gatorade too quickly and have to pee. I feel like I have been learning that lesson as I go- to not GULP the liquid even when I feel thirsty and to take mouthfuls even when I don't feel thirsty.

I cut over to Ave 26 and took it to Figueroa- walking over the 110 FWY. Down Figueroa past Home Depot and onto Riverside. I noticed that there was a bike path along the LA Rive that seemed to start right there. I had been WONDERING where that started! All last week coming to work I saw people riding their bikes alongside the 5 FWY and wanted to see if I could find my way there- and here it was!

So I hopped off the main road and onto the trail. Walking along the LA River (or rather the "LA Trickle" where I was) was quite beautiful. And also a little scary. A lot of it was cement and graffiti and I walked past a group of students/ juvenile offenders that were picking up trash with a vehicle following them. There were some stray dogs who barked and followed me. Lots of lizards, lots of herons, lots of ducks (especially as the river started being more than a trickle. It looked to have its own wetlands in the middle)

There were people fishing in the river, babies playing in the river and it got hot enough that I was starting to wonder if swimming in the river wasn't such a bad idea. I knew it looked gross and a little infected- but MY GOD it was brutal!

I was starting to wonder if picking this LA River trail was a good idea or not? I didn't see any place where the trail connected back to Riverside and I had been walking for a while. Finally I saw a freeway up ahead that was going perpendicular to my path and I realized it was the 2 FWY.

The path I was on started to wind up to a gate that reached a street. It was Fletcher. I walked through the decorative gates that I had seen border some of this path and saw a sign that said RATTLESNAKE PARK. Wow. Rattlesnakes, huh? Had I know that was the name of the park, maybe I wouldn't have ventured into the high grass along the side- the only shade I could find on the trail as I walked. Oh well- so far so good.

I kept drinking swallows of Gatorade as I went, but by the time I reaches mile #7 I was already feeling a little weak. I had eaten some oatmeal before I left to power the walk- but it was either not enough or too recent to be fueling this walk. I had had pasta the night before- but I guess it wasn't enough. At least I had a couple sugary snacks with me too. I ate a tootsie pop and started to feel better. But I had a sugary residue in my mouth that wasn't really helped by the Gatorade- which was getting hot.

I looked ahead to my last mile before I turned around- it was already 12:30p and I saw a stretch alongside the 5 FWY that had no shade up to the sign for the Colorado exit. I decided to do it. Just get to the Colorado Exit sign and turn back. I knew I would be in straight up sun, but I was coming around the half-way point. It would be fine.

I took a look at my hands- which often get a little swollen during these walks and they were REALLY swollen. I felt like my fingers were sausages about to explode! My wedding ring looked like it was getting tighter. I was having trouble opening my Gatorade bottle top, since grasping things wasn't comfortable.

As I got closer to the sign for Colorado I pulled out my iPod and saw I was already at 8.5 miles. I guess I wont be going into Griffith Park, but just stay on the other side of the freeway from it. At least I could see the golf course from where I am. I got pretty darn far!

No need to push it here- everything in my body was saying turn around, so I did. I started walking back toward the shade- knowing it was a couple miles out. I also decided I would get off the trail as soon as a street came up (Fletcher) and walk down to the nearest gas station (Chevron) to get some COLD water and maybe fill my empty Gatorade bottle with ice.

Turning around on that path was a mixed bag. I was now walking against the cars on the 5 FWY, so there was a breeze from the cars- even though it was a HOT breeze- it was at least some movement. I was starting to feel tired. I just kept telling myself I was already half way done- or more! I felt like I had a piece of something in my shoe, too. With all those thoughts rattling around, I looked over to my left back at the river and saw horses crossing from their stables across the way. That was calming- but it was still HOT.

I finally arrived at the Fletcher break in the trail and got to Chevron. I bought a liter of COLD water and chugged half of it right then. I asked the guy who was working there and watching a Lakers game, if he didn't mind me actually spending a few mins in the air conditioning before I went back out. His ice machine wasn't working- or I would've filled up my Gatorade bottle there, too.

AS I left, I tried to unpause my workout on the iPod and instead it ENDED IT! I hate when that happens. At least I am not so crazy about it as I was when I started. Instead, I just started a new workout and figured, in the end, I am the one who knows how far I have gone- this is just a way to track it for myself, no one else. And while I like having my little Mini Me reflect the right amount of miles I did in one trek and I like getting that kudos from Lance Armstrong, that's not what makes or breaks this for me. I feel like I have grown a lot in the last couple months.

I got back on the trail and was happy to see a lot of shade as I went. While the time didn't seem to slip as quickly as when I was on the first part of this journey- it wasn't dragging as badly as it was before the water. I was contemplating calling my husband and seeing if he could pick me up- but on the other hand contemplating finishing. I kept looking for landmarks so I could tell him where to meet me, and kept not finding any- like I was supposed to do this on my own. So I forged ahead.

Right about then, my phone rang. It was a friend who needed some advice. It was a nice break in my thought flow to think about someone else and what they needed. Even though we only talked for a few minutes- it definitely seemed to carry me even farther forward. I was almost at the end of the bike path and about 13 miles into this walk.

I came off the trail when I had met it, under the 5/ 110 FWY overpass. I started walking onto Figueroa, back the way I came. I stopped in at the Circle K to get more COLD water and their ice machine was working. So I filled up my Gatorade bottle with ice, bought a water, spend a min in the AC and took off again.

While I wish I had a fully renewed sense of the journey, the last leg of my walk was still pretty brutal. It was almost 3pm- the sun was still high- and I was headed up Broadway. I didn't realize this on the way out (cuz it was downhill) but the walk is a gradual incline all the way for 5 blocks. By the time I made it over, I was feeling worked. I knew I just needed one foot in front of the other to make it.

I finally made it around to my block and then one last hill. "I can do this, I will do this, I am doing this" I was saying to myself. I saw some neighbors- but couldn't muster enough breath to say hello. I made it to our gate and went in the house. I went right to the sink to soak my hands in cold water- they felt so big. My husband took an "after" pic to go with the before one at the top of this entry.

I took my first "ice bath" after this walk. Well- closest thing to an "ice bath" I peeled off my sweaty clothes and say in the tub with the water as cold as I could get it. I soaked my feet- which were ACHING and my hands, till they became a little more normal sized and less throbby. I noticed after the bath and shower that my ankle was stiff, i got heat rash on only ONE calf (woo hoo!) and i got sun burnt! Even though i had on all the lotion- it crept through between the tank tops. Oh well. More to learn from. I figure this walk was probably the closest to what I will experience in MAY. I know the LA Marathon is starting at 7:10am- but if it takes me 7-8 hrs, I will be walking at the same time I did today for the last half. If I could make it through today, without anyone with me, no support, no aid stations, I can DEF make it through the marathon. I can't wait to tell Hirono about it. After I finish icing. Its still freaking HOT out!

Squeezing in 4 miles before a meeting

2009-04-17T19:28:00.000-07:00

Along with all these big decisions I have been making and this revival of my authentic self, I was asked to share my experience strength and hope at a meeting tonight. I am excited and a little scared. The last time I went to this meeting in Burbank was the last time I spoke at it and I felt like I did a poor job.

The same challenges that have been plaguing me recently were what came up then. "How do I tell my story in a way they will all still like me"- or- "that doesn't make the other people involved hate me- or that doesn't make anyone look bad..." What I have been learning lately is all I can be responsible for is how I feel- not how others will react. So the best I can do is be honest, authentic and let the words that are supposed to come, flow out of my mouth. I know I am guided everyday to do the right thing, as long as I get out of my own way and do it.

So when my class this week ended a little early- 5pm instead of 5:30p - and I was done catching up on work by 6pm, I went straight to the gym to walk it out. I got on a treadmill and watched Larry King (without sound) concede "Twitter"ing defeat to Ashton Kutcher as he sat next to Puff Daddy. It was a little surreal, but it was a way to put my body in motion and clear out my head. It was a chance to meditate on what I would say and then let it go. It was a chance to let go of the expectation that anyone else would be there to root me on.

I have been doing a lot of things for myself lately (but not by myself) and it has been empowering. I am looking forward to tonight.

16 miles- Thanks, Easter Bunny- Bwok Bwok!

2009-04-12T22:29:00.000-07:00

I tried to get more walks in this week-but it just didn't work out. I KNEW that since I missed my long run over my b-day weekend, I HAD to try to get in this weekend's. Looking at my training plan, this week 4/6-4/12 is week #10 of my 16 week official training and was to be a 5/8/5 then 16 mile week.

This week had been an incredibly difficult one. Following our show on Sat night for my b-day I was feeling in credibly exhausted with the whole band thing. I felt like I was taking on too much- promoter, manager, den mom and trying to be creative talent on top of that. It wasn't working. I was getting stressed out. I was upset that everyone wasn't behaving exactly the way I wanted to (like that would ever happen anyway) and I realized I wasn't expressing what I needed, what I wanted with my music and therefore it was stifling me from being able to write new stuff. I realized I was getting a little sick over it, too. I was feeling run down all the time, getting pains in my head and feeling a little sick to my stomach. The biggest thing was the feeling I was overwhelmed- all the time- and then dreading the commitment I had made to rehearse 3x a week. I was exhausted.

Well I spoke to several trusted people in my life and tried to figure out if I should just take a break from the band, or what. I know this was all my own doing- but I didn't know how to undo it without taking action. Ultimately, what I decided was that I needed to quit. To just step out completely for myself. While it was sticky- because I do this thing with my husband, but I cannot make a decision for him- I feel like it was the right move for me right now. That's what a lot of this marathon training has helped me decide- what is right for me RIGHT NOW. So I have stepped out. I think the guys are taking a break- but I have stepped out. They might continue with the name and a new singer to write new music and I cannot wait to see what they do. I wish them all the luck in the world. God Bless.

Speaking of tough decisions, I had more to make. With today being Easter, I didn't know when I would be able to squeeze my run in. I was supposed to go with my husband to my sister-in-law's for Easter ham and an exercise in holding my tongue. I thought we had to be there between 2-3pm, so I might be able to get my run (which I anticipated would take 5 hrs) in during the morning. I had been out the night before a little late with friends after a meeting, so I was planning on setting the alarm and try to do it all.

When I talked to my husband as we went to sleep- he said we actually had to be there between 12-12:30p. That changed it all. How could I fit in 5 hours around that time? It wasn't possible. I expressed that to him and he actually said... "well if you cant make it tomorrow, that's ok." and instead of me ignoring that and assuming I HAD to be there for him, I made a decision for me. I said "Are you sure? It would mean a lot to me to have that time for myself." He said "I'll miss you, but I'll understand." It was like I was given a pass- and this time- I actually took it. I love him so much for understanding and not resenting me for taking him up on it.

Next thing I had to do was figure out where to go. I decided to try to combine my cat sitting for a friend in Pasadena with my walk. I packed up a backpack with my iPod, phone, ID, money, water, Gatorade, granola bar and skittles. This was to be my longest run so far, so I had to be ready- ready like a squirrel is ready for winter. I mapped out a route that took me down Huntington onto Main, into Alhambra, left on Atlantic and into Pasadena on Los Robles- then left on Colorado pas Paseo Colorado (where I made a quick pit stop) and through Old Town Pas, then down Arroyo to my friend's house. That was 10.3 miles.

I stopped, pulled off my knee braces, took care of the cats, fed them, cleaned sandboxes and took out trash. 1 hour later, I had put one of my knee braces in my backpack, since my leg was already getting a painful rash from the shifting brace. The backpack had gotten lighter over the trip with me finishing the Gatorade and some of the water- but it was still hurting my shoulders a bit. As I left her house, I got into the most beautiful part of the walk, down the Arroyo.

I walked under Oak, Elms and Pines, smelled jasmine, honeysuckle and spring blossoms and actually saw a bunny poke its head out from a bush. An EASTER Bunny! I weaved my way on Arroyo drive and then down along the stables and the golf course. I walked up a hill that took me to Pasadena Ave and ultimately to my hill on Monterey. As I reached the peak of that hill, amongst the trash, I saw a child's school craft- a pair of bunny ears- laying along the road. 'Thanks, Easter Bunny- bwok bwok!' and I had to smile.

I saw children still searching for Easter eggs with the baskets, little ones in pretty Easter dresses with their parents and grandparents and I felt myself smiling with pride. Feeling the rebirth that this holiday is representative of. I wished them Happy Easter as I walked on listening to the birds with one ear and Madonna with the other. (I walk with only one ear bud in these days so I have a beat- but am tuned in to the world around me).

I was tired, but felt SO GOOD for taking the day for myself, to do something positive for myself, to allow myself to be filled with memories of Easter with my Grandma and mom, to smile and laugh at the birds and the bunnies and feel love for the world around me. To spend the day feeling open and loving instead of protective, restrained and cynical- which would have been the alternative.

When I got home it was a little after 5pm and I was beat- I had finished another 6.1 miles- making the trip a total of 16.4miles. I didn't even care about the Lance Armstrong announcement I knew was coming, I just took off my headphones and figured I would upload the mileage later. My feet hurt on the outside edges, my knees aches under the caps, the heat rash on my calves and behind my knees was brutal- even though I had put powder on underneath the braces. I immediately showered and thanked my husband for freeing me of the day's responsibilities (since he had just arrived home). Then I sat in the recliner in front of the TV and ate a big plate of leftover ham, green beans and mashed potatoes.

All was well. It was truly a rebirth day.

Birhtday Cupcakes

2009-04-06T22:26:00.000-07:00

Can I just say? - I love Hirono!

I am not going to let her leave. I have the duct tape ready to keep her down in her chair...

Birthday weekend- no runs

2009-04-05T22:12:00.000-07:00

I didn't get any runs in this weekend- but I did get in:

Disneyland on my b-day 4/3
Universal Bar & Grill- show at 11:40pm- 4/4
District Service Meeting at 1pm - 4/5
B-day dinner at Black Angus at 7pm - 4/5

Get to sleep for work. I'll try harder this next week to get some in. Hirono leaves on Tuesday but she said she would make me b-day cup cakes tomorrow! I can't wait!

28 years old again, for the 6th time

2009-04-03T23:41:00.000-07:00

Its my birthday! And I celebrated it today at the Happiest Place on Earth- for free!!

I love that Disney has a birthday club where you can get into the park (either one) for free as long as you can show your driver's license and prove you were born that day- YOU'RE IN!

Its a pretty good racket for the park, too- because you have to figure no one is really going to come by themselves for their b-day. If they want to celebrate, they will bring a slew of people (who all have to pay for their OWN tickets). Pretty smart idea. Worked on us!

My husband had to buy his ticket to join me and I am so glad he did. We had such a fun time together. Plus I put on my running shoes and originally planned to track my mileage. I forgot my iPod, so I wasn't able to officially do that- but judging from my feet pain at the end of the day, I feel like we at least went 6miles.

We went on almost all the rides without much wait. We used the Fast Pass system to get onto Magic Mountain, we got to the Matterhorn early in the day. We went through the House of the Future (Innoventions), Haunted Mansion, Pirates of the Caribbean, Nemo's Submarine, Snow White, Mr. Toad's wild ride, walked through Sleeping Beauty's castle, Indiana Jones, Jungle Cruise and Thunder Mountain Railroad. The only ride that we really had to wait in line for (like more than 1.5 hr) was Peter Pan ride.

Now for any of you who know the Peter Pan ride, you might be thinking- that ride lasts less than 2 mins- how could you wait that long? Well that ride encapsulates almost all the magic of my childhood. Waiting in line, hearing the music, I think of my mom singing "Never smile at a crocodile"... and then you get on the flying pirate ship and fly over London with all the stars below you- it is truly magical, even for this 34 yr old princess. Well worth the wait to do that and to share it with my husband.

The other cool thing about going to Disney on your b-day is that they give you a button with your name on it that says "Its my birthday!". Therefore, I was wished a "Happy Birthday" by more employees at the park than on any b-day ever! Also- it was like a b-day convention! I didn't realize how many people were born on April 3rd, too!! I was wishing happy birthday to kids, to teens, to people my age, to people older than me, to people on crutches and wheelchairs, to people in strollers- it was incredible. It was a great day for sharing the love.

Lastly- we spent some time in New Orleans Square and I got to reminisce on my trip out there last year for Jaime and Charlie's wedding. My husband took me to the New Orleans cafe where I had gumbo and a seafood crepe. Plus I got a birthday beignet that was shaped like Mickey and my husband serenaded me with Happy Birthday! It was an awesome day!

To top it off, when we got back to the car, I had voicemail messages from everyone in my family, including an incredible rendition of Happy Birthday sung by my sister, bro in law and my 4year old niece. I felt so filled with love and happy to embark on this new year, sober and with renewed commitments to myself.

We were talking about WHAT?

2009-04-02T15:00:00.000-07:00

I convinced Hirono to go with me to Sushi again at Empire Center today (didn't take much convincing) and to walk there again (took a little more convincing). Walking there was easy- we were both hungry so getting TO the food is no big deal.

Its when we finish eating and feel a little full and then we want Starbucks before we go (which she bought for me- so I was ALL ABOUT THAT!). Then we're walking with coffee saying to ourselves- why isn't the office closer! Its at those moments when the weirdest things come out of our mouths to pass the time. I am not sure how we arrived at these topics but we ended up talking about (in no particular order) Oct-a-Mom, L word, gay sex, man on man, "goo", humidity, beef jerky, cupcakes, and more...

And dammit if we didn't distract ourselves enough to get back to the office with one foot in front of the other. :)

To and from sushi = 2.49 miles today. Time with Hirono = priceless.

Will Walk for Sushi

2009-04-01T15:13:00.000-07:00

Its so nice to be back to the office with Hirono again. I was sharing with her tales of Omaha, how great it was, how sick I got and the time I did manage to get my walks in. She was really proud of me! Between catching up and filling me in on what I missed- which included some very big news for Hirono- she agreed to walk with me to our Sushi place in Empire Center.

We as we walked we talked about things- like the tornado, the class, the weather in Omaha. We talked about past colleagues and how they are doing. And then we addressed the elephant in the room.

Hirono had told me the last week I was in Omaha (though I promised I wouldn't say anything till it was public) that she was going to be leaving Yahoo! and taking a job in the Healthcare industry as a trainer/ instructional designer. It sounded like an AWESOME move for her, as she would have people reporting to her, continue to do what she is incredibly good at (ID) and be challenged everyday. Not to mention that she would be working with people she knew from past jobs, so there was definitely a comfort level coming into that job.

I know I will miss her madly. She and I have gotten incredibly close since the RIFF in Dec. With it being just the two of us at the office as part of our small team, we have learned to rely on one another. She has been my cheerleader and my confidant. She's been to my house, on a road trip with me, knows more than almost anyone at the office about my true nature and continues to inspire me, as well. I hope I have been to her even half of what she has been to me.

To and from the sushi place today was 2.42 miles and took us 46.5 mins. Leisurely and nice- gorgeous weather, a little hot, and lovely.

It looks like she will be leaving a week from today on 4/7- so everyday that we are at work together I am going to try to get her to come to lunch with me and get my Hirono fix before she leaves. I have never been more inspired in my marathon training, than when I am running with Hirono. It will be weird without her...

Jasmine and Orange Blosom in the Air

2009-03-30T17:00:00.000-07:00

I am back in CALI! I am just getting over the jet-lag (and the fallen tree in my front yard... long story) and so glad I took today off from work to recuperate after my travel. I am taking off today and tomorrow, and then Friday for my b-day!

I am hoping that I can start getting back into my original training mode, where I was actually doing the weekday short(-ish) runs and the weekend long runs. So far I have not missed a weekend long run- even if the run didn't fall on the weekend or I was a little short on the miles, at least I did it!

So today, I did the 14 miler that was planned for the weekend. I took a look online on google maps to find a path. Now- those of you who know I work for Yahoo!- I know its almost blasphemous for me to be using a G product. But they actually have the functionality I need! I've tried Yahoo! maps- but unless you have a specific beginning and end spot- and can assume the mileage is the same on foot as in the car, its not much help. I have tried Mapmyrun.com - but I don't want to sign up for a premium account, so I have ads that get in the way, and also the navigation of the routes is hard to chart. My neighborhood doesn't seem to look right on that map. Google Maps actually has a "walking" route technology which lets me plot my course from my house to wherever I want to go and back- so that's just what I did.

I decided I should be plotting out my course somewhere familiar, so I went with heading into Pasadena. I found out that if I walked from my house down Huntington to Oak Knoll, then left on Oak Knoll into San Marino, past the old Ritz Carlton (now the Langham) to the intersection with California and Lake. Left on California across to Arroyo, left on Arroyo, right on Glenoaks, left on Fair Oaks and Right on Monterrey. Then take Monterrey up and over hill into Hermon and then the crazy hill back into my neighborhood. Plenty of ups & downs, plenty of beautiful houses to look at and plenty of stores/ restaurants (in case I need a pit stop or another drink). I mapped it out and it was 14 miles on the map.

I knew I would need a little more than 4 hours, since our virtual half marathon took us 4hrs., so I got out of the house at 11am. I couldn't have asked for a nicer day. A little cool when I left so I had on a sweatshirt. Actually the real reason I had the sweatshirt on is to keep my stuff. I am finding that I might need something else to keep my stuff for these long runs. I bought a Camelbak water pack, but the first time I tried walking with it I felt a little like a BORG from Star Trek, with tubes going in and out of everywhere- plus the water didn't really stay that cool. I think it was a good investment and will be helpful for hiking and other outdoor activities, but not for long run/ jog/ walks.

The sweatshirt has pockets, so things like my blackberry (in case I need to call for a ride), ID (in case I die and need to be identified), some cash (in case I need to hop on a bus or buy a big mac), house keys (to get back home in the event I finish this walk) a granola bar (for quick protein) and small sugary snacky things (I read that skittles and gummy candy were good for those quick bumps, so I have been bringing trick-or treat sized ones). The one thing the sweatshirt does not have is a zipper on the pockets, so I am safety pinning them- not the best. Plus I am not as fond of my iPod armband, so I have that in the pocket, too. and I am carrying my water bottle (its a Nebraska Husker's bottle I was given as a parting gift from my class. Very cool@!)

So when it starts getting warmer and I have to take this sweatshirt off and wrap it around my waist, part of the walk becomes and exercise in balance- making sure nothing falls out of the pockets as I walk at my 17.5min/ mile pace.

It was really cool to walk sections of town that I normally drive. I feel like I can get anywhere I need to, whether I had my car or not. I know that when I tell people where I went they will be like- WOW that was FAR!. Plus I actually got to look at the houses I always drive by- especially in San Marion. OMG those houses are GORGEOUS! I normally am driving 25 miles and hour- not walking 3.5miles. Just beautiful.

It felt so good to be outside today and not in the office. I was smelling jasmine and orange blossoms as I went. Feeling spring. Feeling alive. Sending texts to friends to break the monotony of one foot in front of the other- and then reminding myself to focus on that one foot in front of the other. My shins stopped hurting after the 2nd mile- as they have been lately- and I managed to stop to stretch them out and my calves, too.

As I walked down California, I saw a friend's friend and her dad walking toward me. She totally didn't recognize me, and I guess it didn't help that I forgot her name at that moment. Oh well, funny to see other people out in the middle of a Monday. Its like we were all playing hooky and just living for the day.

It was a long one today, but I did it. My pace didn't really drag or slow down, I was consistent over the walk. I had a little trouble with the hill on Monterrey, but I did what the book said and kept the positive self talk going- "I can do this, I am doing this, I will do this" and then when I got over the hump- it was all cake from there.

The only downside when I got home was the heat rash I found on the back of my calves. I am not sure if its really heat rash- but it definitely hurts. Its under where my knee brace goes. I had a little of this in Omaha- but I thought it was because it was so DRY there! (Don't even start me on the dandruff I got while I was out there- which has thankfully gone away with my return to LA). I will put on some lotion and see what happens with these "burns" on my calves and back of my knee.

At this point, I should really get real- I have not run/ jogged anything on this walk. I DID complete 14 miles- but it was a walk. Potentially a power-walk? But not a walk/ jog and definitely not a RUN. But you know- I am ok with that. My knees don't hurt, my ankle is a little stiff, but I am not throbbing or heaving like I was when I first tried this. Maybe if I had a little less weight on my frame, I would be more confident in jogging for real- but its not going to disappear overnight- so I have to be good with where I am NOW. And I am. I just finished 14.5 F**King miles in 4hrs and 15 mins! YEA BOI!

Tornado warning!

2009-03-23T22:29:00.000-07:00

I dropped my husband off at the airport this morning before I came into work. The day was warm and seemed a little cloudy- but nice. Not too humid- but became increasingly more so as the day wore on.

Now, I have not spent anytime in the Midwest, aside from this trip, so I didn't know this is what they typically refer to as "tornado weather".

At 5:15pm, the class and I were in the room on our headsets, all on a conference call. They were receiving feedback for the mock calls they had completed that day. All of a sudden I heard a loud horn/ siren coming from outside. I looked up and caught the eye of the trainees with a question on my face. One of them said- TORNADO. (This was the moment I wished my husband was around, so I could tell him all teh "speaker" looking things on top of the buildings downtown really WERE siresn, instead of microwave towers, like he kept saying. Oh well- guess my "i told you so" will have to come later)

So I said to the people on the phone as calmly as I could muster, while my adrenaline started pumping, "We have to go- there's a tornado"

I grabbed my purse and my phone and started following the Nebraska natives to the hallway. I realized the trainer in the room next to me was just standing in her class- next to the window. I know she is from Portland and used to stormy skies, but I also knew she hadn't spent much time in the Midwest. I said to her "Its a Tornado. We need to go. Do you hear the sirens outside?"

She said "Yes- but I didn't hear anything in the building, so I figured it was more suggestive than directive." I was like- "I'm following the trainees. They've handled this before. We're headed to the staircase. I think you should come." She said "Ok- but let me grab our manager" - who is from Burbank, like me, and probably didn't have any idea what was going on.

I didn't want to loose the trainees who headed to the staircase, so I pushed ward. Down 6 flights of stairs and into a room that was used as a gym. There was a TV and a bathroom there in case we had to be there a while. There was also a treadmill. While I thought about walking for a little bit, I didn't have my shoes- so I refrained.

At this point the internal building alarm system started going off telling everyone to get to the "core" of the building. I figured we were comfortably there and just kept watching the news in anticipation of feeling the building rock or shake or lift off the ground.

Needless to say, after the first 20 mins waiting- I started getting impatient and realized that this might be the only tornado I would be in. The news said that the funnel was over Boys Town (where we were) and so a few of us snuck out of the room to see the clouds through the windows. I took a couple pics and then headed back.

We waited it out for close to an hour before the news finally said it had passed and the building announcements stopped. We headed back up to the 6th floor. Most of the trainees took off, but I had to hop back on the phone for my daily debrief and that's when the real weather began.

The roof of the parking garage looked like someone had a pressure hose blowing particles off the top of it. The hail was gumball and golf size- alternating as it hit the windows next to me. And just as quickly as it came- within 25 mins it was gone and the sun came out as the clouds passed along in the sky.

Something I have learned about the Midwest being here, is the wind blows fast and hard and it takes things it has been collecting from one state to another- whether its freezing rain, clouds, or debris. My dear friend told me before I left, "if you don't like the weather in the Midwest, just wait 20 mins" and only today do I understand what that means.

I left for the hotel around 7:30pm and the sun was only starting to set. I guess it didn't get dark right away since the clouds had reversed and the sun was below them. The air was still warm and electric and it was humid. I was hoping I would get to hear some beautiful thunderstorm when I got back to the hotel- but so far nothing as I get ready to sleep.

Who knows what the next few days will bring before I head home on Sat 3/28. My friend Tara was flying in tonight and I so grateful that even though she was delayed in the air for 30 mins she made it in safely. She said she say the funnel cloud in the air from the plane! Amazing world. Amazing day.

My Omaha Virtual Half Marathon

2009-03-22T15:00:00.000-07:00

This morning my husband was still undecided on whether he would join me for my "virtual" half marathon. The clouds were hovering this morning, and it was clear we wouldn't get into the 70's today. I think when he saw me getting on my gear and realized that the day was going to be nice, he may've figured that he'd rather spend it outside with me, than in the hotel room without me :)
I prepared him for the fact that this could take us more than 4 hours, which is why we were starting no later than 9am. That way, when we finished we could go straight to Upstream and get their Sunday brunch buffet as a celebration of our hard work. (Actually, maybe the promise of the buffet is what got him to join me? Regardless, I was so glad he was there!)

I packet my new purse- which is more like a messenger bag- with 3 Gatorades, a couple waters, a couple cliff bars and some jerky. I started off carrying it, but was thankful when my husband was willing to shoulder it. I don't think I realized how tired my shoulders get with something slung over them for long periods of time!

So we took off, into the ConAgra Corp park, the Heartland of America park, across the bridge to the Seaside port and across the pedestrian bridge into Iowa. At this point, we had gone a couple miles and both of us had to pee. We tried to use the bathrooms at the "Playland Park" just on the other side of the bridge, but they were still locked. It was only a little after 9am. So we decided to go to the left and head to the HARRAH's casino.
When we got there- we both realized we didn't have our IDs with us! I asked the guard at the door if he needed to see our IDs and he said "How old are you?" I said, 34 and my husband said "42" and the guy just laughed and waved us in. A little part of me felt old, but it was soon overcome by the part of me that had to go pee...badly! Total culture shock walking into a casino from outside. This casino was set up like a real riverboat on the Missouri River. The smell of cigarette smoke immediately overtook me as we found our way to the bathrooms.

Luckily we did our business and got out of the ringing slot machines and smoke and back into the open flat land. We started walking the other direction on the path- the direction I had never gone before. We found ourselves side by side with the freeway. Seeing exits for G Street, F Street and other parts of Crater Lake and Council Bluffs, Iowa.

The Missouri river was on our left and the freeway was on our right. We had almost reached 7 miles when I suggested we start back. It was actually kind of cold! My nose was a little red and my body was trying to adjust to the heat from yesterday and the chill from today.

We made it down the path to an old Railroad bridge before we turned around. My husband decided to go down and explore it a little. It was one of those old bridges that rotates and connects into one long track or rotates and separates to let ships go by. It hadn't been used in years and was all rusty on the big wheel they must have used to connect the sides of the bridge back in the day.

As we started back, the sun began to break through the clouds. We made our 13.1 mile goal as we approached the hotel and ended up going a total of 13.3 before we got to the room. I had to shower before even contemplating going to Upstream for breakfast. I think both of us underestimated how much strain 13.1 miles would be on our feet. My husband thought he had broken his foot again! But after a few hours of ice and some Advil, he was doing much better.

We got food at Upstream and then laid around the rest of the afternoon watching movies and watching the thunderstorm roll through Downtown O. Its gonna be hard to say goodbye tomorrow. This has been such a great weekend. I am so lucky to have his support.

Exploring the O

2009-03-21T17:42:00.000-07:00

My husband flew into town to see me in Omaha on Thurs morning and today was our first full day together to go exploring! I don't think he expected to go for a long walk- but I strapped on my running shoes just in case. We walked all around the Old Market area, checked out some lofts on Jackson- in a building that was built in 1891, we went to a record store (Drastic Plastic), we had a slice of pizza at Zios, we had some coffee at Aroma, checked out some 2nd hand stores and some of the other cool stuff around.

Then we started walking up 10th st. I admit, I had looked at a map the night before and saw that the zoo, the botanical gardens and the baseball stadium (where they do the college world series) were all off of 10st. Just a couple of miles up. It was beautiful weather today (close to 75! Is this really Omaha?) and so we climbed up the stairs alongside the 10th st bridge (just down from Aroma) and then started going south down 10th street. We passed by the old Union Pacific Central Station- which is now the Durham Western Heritage Museum and Lucky's Lounge - which I hear is owned by Kevin Costner's ex-wife?

We kept walking and passed by a lot of old Victorian houses and some not so nice houses. I guess we ended up in a neighborhood a little more akin to our neck of the woods here in LA. There was a Family Dollar store, lots of churches and a lot of Hispanic speakers. Felt like home.

As we walked- I saw a sign for the Botanical gardens and tried to encourage my husband to go a little further- but he was starting to poop out, literally (2nd note to self about the espresso before walking!)- and also didn't have on the shoes I did. He was wearing Converse and starting to get a blister. So we walked down to 13th st and started walking back. 13th had less cool houses and was way more urban- but it was such a gorgeous day, none of that really mattered.

By the time we got back to the hotel, we decided to take a nap. According to my Nike+ we had actually gone 3.33 miles in the hour we were out!

Tomorrow 3/22/09, is when the Pasadena Marathon is happening. I had signed up to do the Half- Marathon there with Hirono before I knew about the Omaha trip. I decided if I couldn't be there- that I could still do it virtually from here
in Omaha. He doesn't know it yet- but I am going to try to recruit my husband to join me for the 13.1 miles tomorrow. I know it will probably take me 3-4 hrs and it would be so cool if he came with! Let's see what he says...

To Iowa and back!

2009-03-15T19:30:00.000-07:00

I walked to Iowa today. It just sounds so cool to say it! I walked to Iowa- across one whole state.

Granted, where I am staying in Omaha (Old Market, downtown) is not too far from Council Bluffs, Iowa- but just the idea that I could walk across state lines, across the Missouri river is a pretty cool prospect! And who'd've guessed that the weather would be so gorgeous today! at least 72-75 in the sun.

Last time I wrote I was finally feeling better after being for almost a week. By that Thursday I was feeling 100% whole again- had my voice back, not coughing, not wheezy or stuffy. It was great! Then on Friday I picked up lunch from a place called Taco John's- which is similar to a Taco Bell out here in the Mid-West. (Note to self- do not trust any restaurant named after a Mexican Bathroom!)

Needless to say- while it tasted great going down- it did not taste great coming back up. And it started coming back up Friday afternoon before class ended. I had to excuse myself from class between presentations to run to the bathroom. I ended up sick Friday night, all day Sat and was feeling better on Sunday- so I decided to venture out and see if I could actually do the 11miles I was scheduled to do on my training.

I started out by walking in downtown Omaha- in and out of the streets. From 10th up to 19th and back down. Up Jackson and down Farnam, and all the streets in between. When I had exhausted the downtown and hadn't gone more than 7 miles, I decided to hear for the bridge. This pedestrian bridge has only been up for a couple years- so its pretty neat to see it like the Brooklyn bridge, all suspension wires and people.

I went across it to Iowa and started heading toward the most recognizable landmark, the HARRAH's casino. Once I made it there I decided to turn back and go back across the bridge. By then I got a text from Jen that they had picked up Katie (a new student from OR) and had returned my rental car to the hotel lot. They were sitting down for lunch- so I asked if I could join them.

I went through the Heartland of America Park near the ConAgra HQ and back out into Old Market. By the time I walked up to the restaurant I was only at 10.85 miles, so I had to walk around the block a couple times to make sure I hit 11miles. I wasn't too exhausted to do it- and I really really wanted to get to that 11mile mark and hear the Lance Armstrong message.

I walked into the restaurant, that said proper attire required- hoping that meant shoes and shirts- not NO SWEATY PEOPLE IN WORKOUT GEAR, and went straight to the bathroom to try to wash up a little. My hands were swollen and I had to pee- but other than that- I was feeling pretty great for having walked 11 miles in one shot! Today I did 11.01 miles in 3 hours- not too shabby!

Omaha treadmills & Central time TV

2009-03-10T22:15:00.000-07:00

I've been in Omaha now for almost 6 days and I have been sick the whole time! When I flew in on Wed, 3/4/09, I arrived at the OMA airport after 11pm, got my rental car and managed to drive to the hotel and get in bed by a little after midnight. The next day I went to the new office and started working in the training room to get it set up for my class. What that meant was tearing down 11 computer setups and rewiring most of the room. It also involved sifting through a lot of dust and ultimately getting really stuffy.

On Thursday, I thought it was just allergies, but on Friday I was barely able to breathe and then Sat was getting a sore throat on top of it. I called my doctor and asked for a Z-pack prescription. She put it in at a local Walgreen's and that night I went to bed around 8pm. I slept most of Sunday in preparation for Monday's class. I had half a voice on Monday and by Tuesday I was able to breathe with just a little coughing. So I found the treadmill at the hotel and climbed on.

One of the cool things about the treadmill was that it looked out the window at the cold snow (which I was NOT going to go running in) and also up at a TV. Omaha counts as Central time for major TV networks, which means all the prime time shows start an hour before they would back in CA. I got on the treadmill at 7:30pm and ended up stumbling on Biggest Loser (probably my FAV reality show right now- aside from Top Chef and ANTM) and got to watch almost the whole episode while walking. I ended up doing 5.12 miles and went for 1.5hrs total.

While I did walk the whole thing- I felt good for getting up and doing it. After being so road-worn and sick what felt like SO LONG- it was nice to feel my blood pumping again.
On the way out of the gym I noticed that my two traveling companions were having dinner in the hotel restaurant, so I walked over and joined them. It felt funny to be in gym clothes in the restaurant (do' rag and all!) but it was nice to eat a big steak in the company of two great ladies. Plus I DID NOT feel any guilt for the garlic mash and oddly seasoned, but super tender steak I had for dinner.

Back to work tomorrow- up again at 5:30am and down to meet the girls at 6am for breakfast. Then off to the office by 6:30a, arrive by 7:10am with Starbucks reinforcements and prep for class which begins at 8am. Still getting used to the time difference- feels like getting up at 3:30am. I doubt I could actually do this at home... something different about waking up in a hotel. You never really sleep as deeply as you would at home. Just 3 more weeks and I can sleep deeply at home again.

Yahoo! Go Games

2009-03-02T19:00:00.000-08:00

Today was the closest thing I got to another run in during the sales conference. We did a thing called "GO Games" where they broke all 850 of us into 85 teams of 10. Then they gave us a cell phone and had us do an activity that was across between the Amazing Race and a Scavenger Hunt. We had cell phones provided that we downloaded our next clues from and answered some trivia on as well as digital cameras to take pics and video answers to some of the clues. We also interacted with actors who were playing specific contacts at different locations in the hotels. It was really fun!
It was also really exhausting in the heat (90+) to be running from one place to another. So I brought my iPod with me and my running shoes and thought I could calculate how far we ran as we did all the activities!
Well- the lesson I learned during that experiment is that inactivity pauses the Nike+ sensor. So when we ran from one place to another it counted the distance- but when we stopped for more than a minute without intentionally hitting the pause button, the sensor paused itself! Since I didn't know that, I didn't unpause it, nor notice this till after 3 hours- and presumably a few miles. The end result on my sensor was 0.14 miles... BOOOO! Well- at least we had fun. Plus- I was actually able to run and keep up with the other people on my team who appeared to be in much better shape than me!

I think I will have a 10K for dinner, please...

2009-03-01T22:00:00.000-08:00

Hirono and I arrived for the sales conference about 15 mins late, due to some undesirable traffic in Palm Springs. Well- it was undesirable because I took a wrong turn off the freeway when I should have stayed on the 10FWY instead of getting off towards Palm Springs... but that's besides the point... The point is, that from the moment we arrived at 11:15am- we were involved in prep exercises, lunch and then sessions started at 1pm! We had a full day of sessions and the plan we had of doing a run that day- in the daylight was almost lost...

Thank goodness Hirono was up to gearing up and going for a run before dinner. She was originally thinking that we could quickly kick out 3 miles (even though my goal was to go 8) and then make it to our team meeting for cocktails. But we both got so inspired by each other and motivated by each other that we ended up running (and I can honestly say running here- because I ran more than I ever have with her alongside me) for 1.35hrs! We ended up going 6.44 miles and wrapped our way around the Renaissance Esmeralda hotel about 6 times. We were taking part of the golf cart trail and watched them set up for dinner on the back lawn, smelled dinner and when we saw people lining up for dinner- we both decided we were too hungry to go the full 8 miles.

What was so great about this run, is that it was a little before twilight when we started, we saw the sunset, and the stars arise. We heard the band warming up for their dinner performance (like a Surf Punk band without vocals- think Dick Dale's song on the Pulp Fiction Soundtrack) and found our groove together. There were times she was running ahead of me and times I was running ahead of her (which I never thought I would do). It felt like we were there for ourselves- but we were definitely in it together. I knew we were both safe- even as it got really dark.

One thing I discovered on this run is that my shin splints always hurt like a bitch when I start- but they actually WARM UP! By the 2nd or 3rd mile, they stop hurting and I can stop and stretch them out. I used to think that pain would never subside and I would have to just live with it- but I can actually run through it. Then other pains arise- but at least I am recognizing them and none of them seem like emergencies.

I am hoping to get another run in before we drive home on Wed 3/4/09. I found out recently that I will be flying to Omaha for a month on Wed 3/4/09- in the afternoon- so it will be good to get some runs in before I head out. If my experience in Manila was any indication of how it is to open up a new office, then I doubt I will get much work-out time while I am there. And from what I hear about Omaha weather- I doubt any of it will be out doors.

But for tonight, I got in a 10K before dinner and then feasted guilt-free on the fine buffet they had for us, with roast beef, garlic mash, shrimp, pasta and all the fixings. Oh and salad.

Talladega (Friday) Nights

2009-02-27T20:44:00.000-08:00

One thing I have learned so far is trying to do more than 4 miles on the treadmill gets incredibly boring. Even when I alternate jogging with power walking, 4 miles still takes me 1+ hour. This week seemed so tough to squeeze any time in to go out for a walk or to even get a walk in at lunch time. I decided to sacrifice some of my date night and go to the gym after work.

My training had 3/5/3 on the schedule for the week's short runs. Then this weekend I need to try to attempt 8- even though I will be in Palm Desert for the Y! Sales Conference, I am still optimistic that I can squeeze it in. I am driving out there with my running partner, Hirono and she and I talked about carving out some time on Sunday to do it outside and enjoy the oasis they have us staying at. We haven't seen the agenda yet- but are sure they can't have us booked for every second. I expect the 8 miler will probably take me a good 2.5 hours or so. We'll see.

For tonight, I am just trying to get 5 done. So I go to the gym, get suited up in my running capris, strap 'em down bra, wrap-em-up knee braces (I love my new velcro brace with boning. Its been great for my left knee!) and my purple 'do-rag. (always bleeding purple!) I lace up my Brooks and get out to the treadmill.

The gym at my work has 4- 40" flat panel TVs up in front of a row of ellipticals, treadmills and bikes. The first one was tuned to TBS and I was quickly drawn to the movie playing- Taledega Nights. I turned on my iPod to record my distance but plugged my headphones into the TV. I started jogging at the commercial breaks- went for 4 mins on the longest one- and then speed walked during the film. Dammit- if that time didn't fly by! That movie is great for working out to! "Dear tiny infant baby Jesus..."

Needless to say, I was there for 1.22 hours and finished 5.07 miles. While my knees almost buckled on the stairs leaving, I felt really good for getting that in. Now its off to enjoy one day of weekend and on to the sales conference on Sunday! Hirono and I have to leave at like 8am to get there on time... ROAD TRIP!

Sushi never tastes so good as when you earn it...

2009-02-24T17:00:00.000-08:00

This is week four of my official training for the marathon. That means my schedule is to do 3/5/3 miles during the week and 8 miles for my long run. It has been a constant challenge to figure out when I can work my runs into the week, when I work 8-10hrs 5 days a week, go to meetings 5-6x a week, rehearse 3x a week and tutor once a week. Its exhausting just writing all my commitments!

So when I looked at my calendar today and saw there was not a lot of time between meetings, I looked up at Hirono and asked her if she would like walk to sushi? The closest sushi place to our office is California Roll & Sushi in the Empire Center- near the Burbank Airport. It is a little under 1.5 miles away from our office and so walking there and back makes for close to 3 miles.

At about 11:30am I pinged Hirono and asked her if she wanted to go. She was game, so I pulled on my running shoes, grabbed my shades and my money, and we ventured out. We walked at a medium pace (18.43 minute mile) and made it down the street past the construction, in and out of the shade.

We got to the sushi place and sat down and had lunch, the walked back. I tell ya, having a bento box and spicy tuna hand roll with no rice never tastes as good as it does with a little bit of perspiration on your upper lip from walking to the restaurant. I feel like I earn it! like its ok for me to spend $12 on lunch :)

I love doing these walks with Hirono. We have gotten so much closer over the last couple months and I know so much of it has to do with the training. That is a definite WIN for this Marathon stuff!

I tried to do 7 and ended up with 10!

2009-02-21T13:45:00.000-08:00

When I woke up at my parent's house this morning I knew I needed to get my 7 miles in before the rest of the family showed up at 2pm. The night before I told myself if I left between 9-10am, I could be done in 2 or so hours. After all, last weekend it took 1hr 45min to do a 10K (6.28) miles, so adding an additional 0.8 should take me much more time. Two hours should be plenty.

So I rested and got suited up about 10am and left with my cell phone in one pocket, and a pear & chicken jerky in the other. Both pockets pinned up so things didn't fall out. I grabbed my sunglasses, a bottle of water, attached my iPod to my armband and I was off.

I started on the bike trail (Contra Costa Canal Trail) behind my mom's house- between Citrus and Oak Grove (closer to Oak Grove) and started walking toward Citrus. I used to bike these trails when I was a kid and knew where they went pretty well- though the farthest I used to go before was Cowel Rd. I was curious to see with my Nike+/iPod sensor, how far I used to bike! :)

I knew that my Nike+ sensor was being weird right away. It wasn't keeping a steady pace and was bouncing me back and forth between 17 mile/ min, 22mile/ min, 9mile/ min, 15 mile/ min, etc. I didn't know what was wrong, but I knew something was off. I thought maybe it had to do with the fact that I set the workout for a specific distance (7.00 miles) instead of just doing the "basic" workout I normally select. So when I got to the intersection with Treat Rd. I decided to end the workout. It said for the 22 mins I had walked that I had only gone 0.97 miles. WHAT? I knew I was walking at a 17 min/ mile pace- at least! I had even jogged some of that! So I decided to start a new workout and do it as a "basic" one, to see if it would star working correctly.

I continued walking and went past several check points, ate my pear and started sipping my water. I felt with the pear out of my pocket I could jog a little more, so I did. I kept setting goals for myself, like- just run to the next Stop sign. but was still disappointed when I looked down and saw the pace jumping- often at 0.00 miles/ min- and it was 24 mins and I had barely passed a mile!! This can't be right. I have gone almost a whole hour and have only done 2 miles!! This time I thought the problem might not be the setting (since i was on a "basic" workout) but maybe that the iPod is used and has been freezing up on me. I thought I might need to reboot it and try again, so I did.

At this point, I was already at the intersection with Cowel Rd (where I used to bike) and thought to myself- wow, its only 2 miles from home? That's all I used to bike as a kid? I guess I never went far before! I reset the iPod to a basic workout and started again. Now- the challenge with all these restarted workouts, is I am not sure if the Nike+ site will reflect them as three different workouts and add up the mileage, or if I need to just scrap those first two and do a full 7 miles on this workout for it to even count?

Regardless, after this third retry, I am still seeing the same stupid mixed up pace. I guess i started to believe that it was correct and I just wasn't working hard enough. So I kept walking (running a lot less) and made it past Clayton Blvd, past Concord Blvd and to Willow Pass Rd. I was actually really close to my brother's house and I had a fleeting thought- 'if I collapse right now, I could call him and he could find me on the side of the road'. Willow Pass Rd is where the Canal trail ended and it still said I had not done more than 1 mile since Cowel, so I went up the street to Olivera and headed down that road toward Pixie Playland (www.Pixieland.com).

I passed by all the baseball diamonds I used to play at when I was in Little League and even a bit into High School. The All Star diamond and look- they added a new batting cage! I passed by the Tennis courts and the Concord Community center, where I spent a summer between 1-2nd grade for day camp. It was the place I got cast in my first musical, when I played Annie, wearing one of my mom's wavy red wigs not exactly a tight perm. I also remember that summer for the cooking class and making my first Manwhich.

I decided to stop there to quickly use the public restrooms since i had needed to go for a while, but assumed I would be done in two hours and not worry about this. I was already close to 45 mins on the last workout (so about 1hr and 35 mins in the trip). Feeling a little refreshed, I continued on.

When I got to Pixie Playland, it was a lot smaller than I remembered, but the train was just leaving. I forgot it went out of the park and around the little lake behind it. I saw that I didn't have to pay to get in, just pay if I wanted to get tickets for the rides, so I power walked in and walked around the rides, seeing what I could remember. I mostly just remember feeling it was WAY bigger as a child. Then I walked out of Pixie Playland and followed the train path around the lake. The were ducks, geese and a lot of seagulls. I forgot about the seagulls. We used to have them all over my High School quad, too. i never see Seagulls in LA, unless i am actually near the beach.

I passed the little lake and walked to the end of the baseball diamonds (www.Callbaseball.com) where a family named Call has bought the remaining two diamonds and they were doing a clean up day there. I looked at the iPod and even thought it only said 1.25miles (which I was planing to add to the other two- 1 mile workouts) I thought I should return. I was getting tired and didn't know why it was taking me this long to do such a small amount of mileage.

As I walked back and got back onto the trail at Willow Pass another thought dawned on me. Yesterday, when I was showing off my new gear to my folks, I pulled out the Nike+ sensor that goes on my shoe. I didn't think about how I had put it back in. Maybe I had slid it in wrong? I stopped and put my foot up on a post and turned over my Bean Pod to slide out the Nike+. It did seem to be upside down from how I normally have it, so I flipped it- so the logo was pointed up (the way it would sit if it were in the shoe itself) and straightened the bean pod back out across my laces. IT IMMEDIATELY STARTED WORKING RIGHT!!

What a long lesson to learn! This time, it went from the 1.50 miles it was at when I made the change, to 2, then 3, then 4, then 5 and by the time i got home, it said 6.01 miles. I was already sore when I got home, I could feel it. I was also a little exhausted and felt like I had lost a lot of nourishment, so I hopped in the shower (right as my brother and his family arrived) and when I hobbled down stairs, I started eating.

I got curious later in the evening about how far I actually went, so I looked it up on Google Maps. It left me plug in the address to and from and select "walking route." I was able to zero in on the bike trail and then calculate the distance for what i actually did (see map picture above). Guess what- I went 5 miles- ONE DIRECTION!

Three hours and 10 mins, later, I got back at my parent's house. My left ankle is hurting a bit and my right heel, too. My knees feel about the way they normally do and my calves are pretty tight. I did stretch in the shower and on the floor, but I am feeling tight still.

So, in my attempt to be good and hang on till I reached 3.5 miles on a sensor that wasn't working right, I ended up going 5 miles before I even turned around. I didn't have to do 10 miles for another 2 weeks of training! Am I nuts? I am just glad I figured out the problem with the sensor, so it doesn't happen again. And hey! I did TEN MILES TODAY! Whoo hooo- I mean, OUCH!

Its a Beautiful Day!

2009-02-19T08:20:00.000-08:00

Oddly, I woke up this morning at about 7am, after going to bed at 2am again. There was something inside me that said, you know you are flying to Oakland today, and unless you get your 3 mile run in today, you will have to do it tomorrow and your long run (this week is 7miles) will end up happening on Sun- which is another flight day. So get it done, Noelle!

Well I fought that thought for another 30 mins and didn't actually get out of bed till 7:30am- thinking, 'but I've only had 5.5hrs of sleep! shouldn't I rest?' While that was a fair argument, when I said "oddly, I woke up" I mean it. It was odd that I wasn't feeling so exhausted in the morning that I couldn't function. Instead it was like auto pilot to pull on my gear, including my sweatshirt and go out into the 35 degree morning and jog to the "gym". I got inside and took off my jacket and began to do the treadmill.

After I queued up my iPod to do a basic workout, the screen froze and I had to hop off the treadmill. Now this is starting to happen more frequently- which I don't think is a good sign. My iPod is a used 2nd generation Nano with 2GB of memory. I don't know if its age is why it keeps freezing up or what- but so far, as long as i can reboot- which I learned how to do online- I have been ok. It hasn't been too much of a distraction and hasn't taken too long to fix.

So I get on the treadmill and by the first 10 mins I was bored already. I thought about something my friend Tiffany had said about jogging outside in OR- how beautiful it is and how nice it is to warm up outside. She and Hirono did it together when they were training for the Portland Marathon. (Yes- apparently Hirono is famous for pulling her friends in to do marathons with her. Tiffany still says she was tricked into doing it and is working on forgiving Hirono. Cupcakes and dinners at Paley's have helped. *wink*)

I looked outside and even though it looked cold, the sun was shining and it seemed to be calling me out. So I took a towel and wrapped it around my neck, Rocky-style, put my sweatshirt back on and zipped it up with the hood on, and ventured outside.

It immediately struck me that outside was 35 degrees and not the 70 degree "gym", so I started to jog. Its amazing how motivating cold air is to actually MOVING your ass. So I jogged some and then I walked and then I jogged and then I walked. And I looked around. I took a path around Orenco station- near the hotel and behind New Seasons and looked at houses. The frost on the roofs and grass. The beautiful red colored vines that had been stripped of their foliage in the winter weather, but were still so vibrant and bare.

At one point, during the song, "Beautiful Day" by U2, I could hear the birds chirping so loudly through my headphones, that I just took off my headphones and listened to myself breathe and the birds sing. It was a beautiful morning. I passed by some people and we said 'Good morning' and finally made it back to the hotel 3.19 miles later.

I went into the hotel lobby and tried to enjoy their complimentary "continental breakfast". Which included Orange & cranberry juice, miso soup, a hard boiled egg, a slice of toast and some Siracha. Oh and a banana for the road. By this time it was 8am so I went back to the room to shower, check out and go to work.

Oh, I go walking... after midnight...

2009-02-19T00:46:00.000-08:00

Yes, Its not just a great Patsy Cline song, it was me tonight.

I had a wonderful dinner at Paley's Place in NW Portland tonight with two former colleagues and great friends. Our reservations were at 6:30p and I didn't get back to the hotel (totally stuffed on amazing food- crab, oysters, Kobe beef, creme brule!) till after 10pm and then I had to try to digest before I could even walk!

I put on my running gear at about 11pm and jogged outside to the "gym" (remember- a treadmill, exercise bike and stair master). It was about 30 degrees outside, which is great motivation to jog to the gym. Once I got inside, I stretched a little and hopped on the treadmill. Then I called my husband to say goodnight and was fortunate enough to talk to him for about 15 mins of my 3.5 mile an hour walk (which has my pace at about 17:20min/ mile).

I tell ya- there is nothing quite so boring as spending more than an hour on a treadmill- especially when you are full. So I just kept it to walking tonight. I was glad when the first mile was absorbed in a phone call. Even more pleased when I turned the treadmill TV on to OPB (Oregon Public Broadcasting) and got to see half of the "HistoryMakers" with Eartha Kitt. Her last recorded interview. That was an enjoyable 35 mins (2 more miles).

Then it was midnight. Suddenly all the ads changed from Diapers and groceries to ads for "phone hook-ups", "love lines", "chat with hott girls" and other sorts of lonely TV that it made me wonder who else was up and what they were doing. Certainly not all on treadmills, I hope!

Regardless, it was less than 30 mins more to finish my 4.19 miles tonight. And so ends another late night of marathon training on the road. I can't wait to see how I will squeeze my 3 miles in tomorrow, between checking out of the hotel (goodbye little "gym"), going to work, and driving to the airport to fly to OAK on an 8:40p plane? Oh well, I am sure it will all be made clear when I need to know. I am definitely gaining some more faith in the fact that whatever is supposed to happen... will. As it regards to my training. As it regards to my life. God Bless us all!

Travel and 24 hr gyms

2009-02-18T01:32:00.000-08:00

I am in Portland today. Its been raining on and off. I am here for business and woke up at 5am to get on the plane this morning. By all accounts I should be wiped out exhausted. But there is a part of me that is really committed to this training thing! After all, now that i know I will be going to Omaha for the majority of March (and missing the Pasadena half-marathon on 3/23, too!) I have to make sure I can include this training as part of my life- no matter what.

So even though I had a girl's night out, relaxing with friends at a spa, replete with a massage and sushi for dinner (which I INHALED I was so hungry! I guess the calorie consumption is catching up with me now that I am going longer distances, like my 10K on Sat!), I still felt the need to suit up and go to the "gym" at the hotel. I put that word in quotes since it is a room that has a treadmill, a StairMaster and an exercise bike- that's it. But it does the trick.

I updated my Facebook status to say I was on my way to do three miles and grabbed my iPod. Honestly, I know the biggest factor with my motivation is getting to see my little mini-me avatar dance around after I record the mileage- which won't happen unless I do the work. But for some reason, the screen saver isn't working! It keeps going to a blank page! I have to get this fixed because I have just figured out how to capture her in a pic and add her to my blog! Its like she's a little Pixie or a sprite who's photo should not be snapped or she will disappear. That's what seems to have happened.

I haven't have the avatar work properly since Valentine's day! I came back from the gym and tried to upload my 3.1 miles tonight (which btw- I was panting so hard on the three run songs I did I kept pulling my iPod off the front of the treadmill. Tomorrow I will use the armband!) So I am trying to uninstall and reinstall her tonight. I will figure it out. I don't think I will really want to do it or be quite so enthused without her.

Big Milestone for today- I completed a goal of 50 miles in 4 weeks- and did it within 3.25 weeks! Next goal- starting tomorrow is to do 75 miles in 4 weeks! Then I get another medal on the Nike+ site- which is almost as good as my avatar screen saver... but not quite.

Happy Valentine's- here's a 10K!

2009-02-14T14:45:00.000-08:00

On Saturday, Valentine's day, the rain of the previous day had lifted. Roses were blooming. Love was in the air. I had just found out the week prior at work I would be going out to Omaha for almost a month. I am a Cali girl and have never really done the cold weather thing- so I knew I needed to go and get a coat and there were various other errands that were scheduled for the day.

However, I knew that my long run for the week was 6 miles, and that the rain was expected to come back on Sunday- so there was no time like the present. I asked my husband as he was watching his favorite Sat. morning TV show (Flip this House on A&E) and he said he would join me! How romantic!

I had plotted out a path that would take me 6 miles or so and after getting my iPod in the arm band, my shoes on, the bra on, the Camelbak backpack on (this was quite an ordeal getting all suited up for this walk/jog mind you. I am trying to make sure we have all the resources we need and I look like a robot of some kind with the tubes from the back pack and the cords my my iPod and the leggings and everything else.)

We got out the door and headed across Huntington drive first. Then turned left at South Huntington and began to jog through the first song on my playlist. We slowed down for the next song and continued to walk up hill to Herriman/ Collis street and crossed Huntington and went to the left up Herriman. We were talking and walking, singing each other the songs on our respective players.

The we took a street to the left and crossed back down to Collis. I checked the iPod. We were a little more than 2 miles at this point. I had a feeling like- UGH that's all? Why isn't it more yet? Then my husband says- He let's jog to that shadow over there. And I said, ugh- why? and he said "come on- it won't be bad" Just then another jogging song came on and so we were off- only I felt my body saying- "why are you doing this.. I don't wanna!!"

Now- it wasn't saying- STOP I'm HURT- it was saying I DON'T WANNA. I am learning the difference between pain (which I was also in- but like before, I asked the foot pain and the shin splints and the knee grinding to just come run with me) and my natural laziness. I worked through the laziness and dug in and ran past him.

Then we slowed down together for a few more songs. 3 miles. We are now turning to the left down Ave 60 and starting to go down hill. I realize we are half way there and I am not sure we have 3 more miles left in the path- plus my husband is starting to need to go to the bathroom- but he is valiantly holding it. (NOTE TO SELF- do not drink coffee prior to runs or you might find yourself in a tough place out on the road with no way to get home but walk/ jog)

We turned left onto Monterrey and started up that big hill that's carved out of the mountain that I referenced in last weekend's 5 mile walk/ jog. We jogged through another song and I noticed that he's pretty good at keeping pace. He actually seems kind of a natural at this whole jogging thing... damn it! Actually its a blessing- cuz it means I have a companion.

I have to stop a couple times on the way up the hill to adjust my knee braces and stretch out my legs- but aside from that we're doing good. I run to catch up with him after my adjustments. When he looks at me I say- "No- don't run, I am just catching up!" and I am close to out of breath- this is definitely work.

Then I say something stupid, "Do you want to take the side road up the hill?" He says "Sure!" as we start walking it- I realize its the steepest part of the mountain by FAR! What was I thinking? As I pant my way up, "OMG, OMG OMG- I can I will I am able, OMG OMG OMG- make it stop!" we finally reach the peak and then its downhill from there. As we swerve our way down Monterrey, we notice we're a little shy on the mileage so we walk behind Our Lady of Guadalupe Church/ School and over to the Rose Hill project housing. I lead him over to the base of the park we walk when its actually dry out- this walk has been pretty muddy.

Another hill. WTF with our neighborhood?

We make it up and around and manage to take Sardonyx Ave to Topaz to Pyrites to Esmerelda and back to the house. As we walk past the church next to our house I check the iPod again. 6.23 miles. OMG! We did a 10K! I am so excited! Its been 1hr 45min. Not too bad for the first 10K I ever did!

I had been a little jealous that my friend Hirono had done a formal 10K the weekend before (though I wouldn't have been ready) around Dodger Stadium. She said she did it in 1hr 12 mins! Now that is impressive. I keep telling her she likes running- but she denies it all the way...

We get home and proceed to run errands and we both get headaches. This is our first major lesson in race nutrition. We burnt over 1000 calories that walk/ jog. We needed to eat a little better before and after- and our bodies made us suffer a bit for it. We prepared some pasta and veggies and took a nap. Happy Valentine's Day!

WTF with this Nike+ online system?

2009-02-12T16:00:00.000-08:00

One of my biggest joys and biggest motivators is my Nike+ sensor for my iPod and the online system. I love my mini-me avatar and my screensaver, which shows her running around and dancing. She has little thought bubbles that congratulate me on my latest recorded run- saying things like "With running in my corner, I can do anything!" and "I feel unstoppable after my 3.23mile run!"

The screensaver (and online tool) also shows me a summary of the number of workouts I have recorded (19 to date!) and miles total I have done since I started using the sensor (54.53miles) and my average pace (16.51 mins/mile).

All this stuff is awesome! And I know I have previously mentioned how, when posed with the question of: Workout without the sensor or Don't workout- I am likely to pick the later, since I know it will COUNT. Count for something! After all- what the heck am I doing this for? Doesn't it need to count for something? HA!

So when I log into my Nike+ tool and it tells me I am 3 miles behind in my weekly workouts (I have loaded my training schedule from the "Non Runner's Marathon Training Guide" book) I get a little peeved. Who the heck does it think it is? Just cuz I skipped Monday, I made up for it today! So I did 3/4/3 on Tues, Wed and Thurs- instead of Mon, Tues, Wed- why doesn't it see that? UGH. Only flaw, really, in the whole system that I can find.

Bottom line, I bailed out of training for a little bit today at lunch (luckily I had a different person presenting) so I could still make my 5pm meeting at work and my 6pm meeting in Burbank. I feel accomplished and proud that I have kept this as a priority. I am a little concerned how I will do this when I am in Portland/ Oakland next week (traveling for biz) but I am sure I will figure it out, one day at a time.

Today after the run (which I ran to 3 of the songs on the playlist-same ones as on Tues) I feel pain my my arches, heels and my calves are tight. Guess its not the best idea to sit down in a class for 3 hours after a run.

Oh- in case you were wondering, my left knee is still swollen. I am on a pretty regular Advil and ice regimen at this point. The only reason its worth mentioning, is that the right knee is starting to swell, too. So I wasn't sure if the other had gone in size? But no, the right knee has just gotten bigger. OH JOY!

Also news of note- I lost 2 pounds as of last week- which means 1 pound total since the start of this. But the really good news is I had been eating Ben & Jerry's Brownie Batter ice cream throughout last week- and STILL lost the weight. So I guess my metabolism is starting to speed up and wants to get a little leaner as I go. I am all for that! GO METABOLISM!

When can I get in a run?

2009-02-11T21:06:00.000-08:00

It is Wed. Third day of Search AM bootcamp training. The day that I deliver all the material. I was supposed to have a meeting at 5pm right after class and a meeting at 7pm in Pasadena. Trying to figure out when I could add in a 4 mile run was a challenge.

Aside from time, I am also dealing with some stiff calves and general pains and pings in my feet and knees. I am starting to feel my low back and hips tighten up a little more than normal. The good news is that I had my gym gear with me- including my shoes :)

As luck would have it (or not for the class?) the last two presenters weren't able to attend the session. So it is 3:30p and class was done. I manage to get my 5pm meeting pushed to Thursday and I go off to the gym!

The day before I used the same 1hr iPod song mix. On Tues for my 3 mile run, I walked the majority of the time between 3.2- 3.4 miles/hour and jogged at 5.2/miles/hour for few songs. For my 4 mile workout today, I actually jogged (at 5.2 miles/hour) for FOUR songs instead of THREE songs (I added a jog to the first song on my playlist "Ain't No Other Man"- Christina Aguilera).

This is the first run where I got my heart rate up to 180 (according to the treadmill) and had a little trouble catching my breath afterwards. I'm not sure if I am fighting off a cold of just have a lot of phlegm, but I feel a little wheeze in my chest. Maybe it was a result of this being the first MAJOR cardio workouts I have been doing since I quite smoking? For whatever reason, I felt it, but I tried to use a tactic I learned in the Non-Runner's Marathon Training Guide book.

I tell myself that the breathing felt strange (I recognized it), but then tell myself "it doesn't matter." I'm not dying. (I can. I will. I am able.) I recognize those feelings and asked them to come run with me. Recognize the shin splints and told them to join me in the run. Recognize the pain in my knee and ask it to join me in my run.

After the run I felt great. Worn out. I stretched out my legs, my hips and my back on the mat. Then I went to the locker room and grabbed my stuff. I didn't have enough time to change before heading home to meet Arleigh and head off to Pasadena.

There's a six thirty AM?

2009-02-10T16:45:00.001-08:00

I was so disappointed that I didn't pack my shoes yesterday that I convinced myself before I went to sleep, that I would get up early and go to the gym in the morning before class. Last Jan, I was able to commit to a 7am Yoga class at my office gym, so I thought that this shouldn't be too bad.

My alarm rang at 6:30am- its cold, my cat, Jerry, is nuzzled in with me, the blankets are warm- I hit snooze. 6:38am- its still cold, Jerry has moved, blankets are still warm and I promise myself I can throw on my gym clothes fast- I hit snooze again. 6:46am- if I don't get up now, I won't get up at all. I somehow manage to motivate and turn off my alarm and get up.

I throw on (well, it actually took about 15 mins) my running gear and made sure I had my work clothes in my bag to change into at the gym. I grab a banana, some yogurt, my "joint juice" and start my car and load it. Kiss my sleeping husband goodbye and get in the car by 7am.

Its surprising how quickly I can get to work when I leave early! I pulled into the parking garage at 7:16am. I walked to the gym, got my stuff in a locker, made a pit stop and hopped on a machine. I started my trek at 7:40am and was in front of a flat panel TV that had an old episode of Tales From the Darkside, starring a young Allison Sweeny (host of my current favorite show- Biggest Loser") as a psychic kid who can tell when someone is going to die. Fun to watch without sound.

I was listening to my 1 hr workout mix and walking at a 3.2- 3.4 mile an hour pace. This morning I actually managed to jog (@ 5 mile an hour pace) for an entire song- three times! Granted they were initially pretty short songs (Phantom Planet's "Badd Business" & "Big Brat") and then a normal length song (Garbage "Cherry Lips (Go Baby Go)). I was able to get my pace to an average of a 15 minute mile by the end of my 47 min work out and completed my 3 miles for today!

Tomorrow I am going to try the same thing. I have 4 miles to do, so I can't indulge in the snooze bar. Or I may skip my evening meeting and just do it at the gym after work. I can get over there by 5:45pm if I choose to do that. I guess I'll just play it by ear.

I also found out I might have to be out of town for business the month of March- which is kind of disappointing and flattering all at the same time. The big bummer is that I will have to cancel a band gig on 3/15 and might not be able to do my half marathon on 3/22. But I guess if I am in the middle of Nebraska for a month, there might not be much to do but run... I mean... jog/walk. or who knows... I might actually become a runner out of this? Anything is possible.

I FORGOT MY SHOES!

2009-02-09T12:32:00.000-08:00

Dang-Nabit!

I packed my gym stuff early this morning so I could get out the door and get set up before my class. I packed my iPod, my knee brace and extra change of underwear- but neglected to grab my SHOES!! ARGH!

This was one of the only days this week that I knew I had more than an hour for my lunch break and there's no way I can try to walk/jog in the converse I am wearing (not even with the orthopedic insoles I have on).

I am almost willing to try the converse, too- but my Nike + sensor is on my workout shoes, so even if I did it today- it wouldn't COUNT on the site. I guess I have to admit when it comes down to it- that what matters most to me is the tracking. It is about the pats on the back I give myself when my Mini Me avatar is running across my screen and her thought bubbles say "I feel so good after that 5.3 mile run!" -even if I walked the whole thing and didnt run.

I am not sure if that is the right motivation for all this- but I am not at a place where I feel I can question ANY motivation- as long as whatever it is actually gets me to do it! So I am bummed today! Maybe its the universe's way of trying to teach me a lesson about taking a rest day (even though Sunday was a rest day) or a lesson about my perfectionism.

I have been questioning whether I am doing the training "right" since I am not really running- but walking- the majority of my miles so far. But if I really stick to my goal of "FINISHING" the marathon- not winning, not running, not "killin it"!, then walking is sufficient. It might change over time. I guess I get so wrapped up in having a reason to beat myself up or reward myself, that if I am not doing one of those two things I feel lost.

For today, no miles. I wish it were different, but its not. Shoot, I wish I had even remembered to bring my book to read to take up the time! Now I might actually have to catch up on work! DOH!

5.3 miles and rolling!

2009-02-07T23:46:00.000-08:00

It is Saturday Feb 7th. I woke up at 9am today- exhausted from a 3.5 hour band practice the night before. I was worried that my voice might be a little fried and concerned that we have a show tonight at 9pm! Just 12 hours! Even though I really just wanted to roll over and go back to sleep, I knew that there were two things I had to do today: go to the pet food & grocery store and get in my 5 miles. The fact that it was raining buckets when I awoke, made me wonder how I would get them both done.

I decided to just get up and do the cat food thing (it did help motivate me to have my cross eyed white cat, Jerry, knead my chest and bemoan the fact that he did not have any wet food). So Arleigh and I got in the car and did the 99 cent store, PetSmart and Albertsons in the rain. On the drive home from Alhambra, we noticed the sky was beginning to clear up.

I figured it might be my only chance to get outside today, so I started to suit up. I was excited to try out my new knee brace (with velcro & boning~ oo-la-la!) and knew I had to take a route that would actually net me 5 miles. I asked Arleigh if he wanted to go and was surprised to find out HE DID!

So I threw on a fleece, with my cell phone in left pocket, keys in the inside pocket and iPod with my Nike+ in the left pocket and we walked. It was definitely more of a walk than a run today. We may've jogged a total of 7 minutes out of the whole 1hr and 36 minutes. But that was fine with me. I was tired, I was sore and I was definitely feeling the hills in my neighborhood.

So here was the route- We left our house and went up and over the left side of Pyrites (little hill) behind Huntington Elementary School. Then down Huntington Drive North- past the intersection with Monterey Rd. and up to Collis (slightly larger hill). We went right on Collis and walked it all the way down to Hill/Avenue 60 (1.2 miles and small incline). The we walked down Ave 60 to Monterey and headed left towards the hill I have always thought about tackling. It looks like it is an art deco valley and it literally carves into the side of a mountain. The street runs between two 20 ft retaining walls and it has on coming traffic in both directions. I have driven this hill thousands of times in the 8 years I have lived here- but never once tackled it on foot. I have always wanted to and I did it today!

As we walk, I really noticed how beautiful the sky had become. So clear and bright. The sun was shining down. Barely a cloud in the sky! It was perfect timing for this walk.

We continued down Monterey Rd after cresting the art deco mountain, and turned right on McKenzie to cut away from the traffic. We kept going down the hill and rounded back around Monterey and arrived at the intersection with Huntington. We walked up the back of Our Lady of Guadalupe Church and back to Pyrites and home.

When we got home, the iPod said we had actually gone 5.3 miles and burned 990 calories!! Better than even that, when I ended the workout, I out one of my ear plugs in Arleigh's ear so he could hear it to, Lance Armstrong congratulating us on the farthest workout yet! And to keep it up.

Even though I am sore, my feet hurt all over, I did it! I iced my knee and took some Advil. Drank some milk (and water) had a banana and a sandwich. Oh and also had some Ben and Jerry's... gotta love the calories being burnt!

My friend Hirono is doing her "5" mile workout on Sunday at a 10K (which I have learned is 6.2 miles) around Dodger Stadium. I can't wait to hear how that goes for her!

This week I did 17 miles total! Amazing!

4 Weeks in and Finally blogging...

2009-02-06T15:39:00.000-08:00

As of today, Feb 6th, I am officially done with the first 3 weeks of "pre-training" and almost done with my first full week of real training- minus the 5 miles I have to figure out how to get in during the rain.

I was trying to journal about all this and why I made the decision to sign up for the LA Marathon on 5/25 and now the Pasadena Half-Marathon on 3/22, but I guess my hands cramp up a lot more than they used to- when I would sit for hours in a coffee shop and wax poetically about the people hanging out or walking by.

Here's how it started...

About a month ago, just after returning to the office from the X-mas Holiday, my co-worker, Hirono, asked me if I might be interested in doing the LA Marathon with her. I knew she had done the Portland Marathon in 2008 and there was part of me that thought- if she could do it, so could I. But back then I though- I could just show up on the day of the Marathon and DO IT. I had no idea the type of training involved. I had a chance to see my friend Karen train for the NYC Marathon (which requires you to qualify for the race, etc- WAY hard-core) and last year and began to understand the level of commitment required to do something like that. And yet... there was part of me that wasn't daunted by the possibility.

After Hirono said that she had signed up and wouldn't it be fun to do it together, etc- I started seriously thinking about it. I have been wanting to get in better shape and loose some weight (well- when haven't I wanted to do that... lol) and I know that the way my body works- I have to exercise to get that to happen. There has only been one time in my life when I have lost weight from watching my diet alone and my foot was in a cast at the time. But that's another story...
There was a part of me that felt like it was impossible. I am NOT a runner. I never have been. If someone isnt chasing you, why would you possibly want to run?

But there was a bigger part of me that kept saying, WHY NOT. Why not try? Why are you always telling yourself- NO. How many times have you let that voice decide for you?
The clincher was hearing someone speak later in the week at a meeting. The gist of her whole story was- "Now I am doing all the things I never tried, because I never thought I could." It got me to start questioning myself and ask "What would you attempt if you knew you could never fail?"

So I went to the running store that weekend with my husband (whose initial reaction to my saying I wanted to do a marathon was- "Really? But you don't run. I have never seen you run. Why would you want to do it?" and later- as the weeks have progressed has been my biggest supporter. My mom had a similar reaction- but it had more to do with our genetics and crappy joints- more about swollen knees later) and got fitted for shoes. Now, I had the business card for this store for over 2 years. Given to me by my chiropractor, but never went. I kept telling myself I would do more/ better exercise if I just got shoes and never did. I knew this was a big first step (all puns intended).

The next thing I did was hop on eBay. Hirono had already shown me her Nike+ sensor and her Nike Mini-Me avatar. It was really cool to know that she could track her mileage, time, calories and pace on this thing and then have a cartoon encourage her to do more. I decided to find one and get one on eBay. I also got an iPod, and Armband, a book called the Non-Runner's Marathon Training Guide (awesome book!!) and MORE... Call it retail therapy for making a big decision.

Then on Sunday 1/11- I went to the LA Marathon site... and signed up.
It was a huge moment. Filled with trepidation. Could I actually do this thing? Would I make it to May? Was I going to fall on my face, or dislocate my knee or break my foot again? Would I loose weight or gain it or be able to make it?

So far, I have not lost any weight. I have played with a pound- back and forth for the last three weeks, but it hasn't left yet. I walked and tried jogging every day for at least 30 mins for the first 2 weeks, then moved up to 45mins everyday the last week of pre-training. This week I walked/ jogged (it ends up being like 4-7 mins walking then 1-3 mins jogging in a 10 min span) for 3 miles on Mon., 4 miles on Tues, 3 miles on Wed. and walked to lunch with Hirono on Thurs- 1 mile there and 1 mile back (with a nice sushi reward in between). Today is Friday, my rest day. I am glad its a rest day, because it is POURING rain. Well at least as much as LA can pour rain. But its really coming down, roads are flooded and its not a good looking scene for outdoor activities- unless you have a canoe. My long run for the week is supposed to be tomorrow- 5 miles. We'll see how I do with the weather tomorrow- but I am hoping for a 1-2hr window where I can try to get this done.

My goal is not to get some great time. To cross the finish line with other people. I am learning that running (remember- when I say running- you say "walk/jog") is a very solitary sport. SO my goal- is just to FINISH the marathon. I don't care if it takes me 7-8 hours (now that IS optimistic) or 9-10 hrs (that is realistic) or 12 hours (maybe if I get hurt). I just want to finish.

So far its going well! I am motivated and doing my best to stay with the training plan. I LOVE my Nike + on my iPod. One long walk, I went 4.10 miles and at the end of it, the iPod voice gave me a summary of my run and then I hear "This is Lance Armstrong. Congratulations on your longest workout yet! Keep it up!". HOW COOL WAS THAT? Totally motivating. They definitely have my number.

The down side at first was my feet. Breaking in my shoes took about a week of pain on all parts of my feet. I guess I figured I would get good shoes and have no pain- it would be like walking on clouds and stuff. Nope- to take feet that have falling arches and past breaks and arthritic toes and put them in good shoes, doesn't stop the fact that the feet are jacked. Then once I got my shoes broken in more, the feet have been OK- with some small arch issues every now and then that I try to stretch out.

The bigger issue is my knees. My left knee has not stopped being swollen since I started. It has been different levels of swelling, but it has not gone down to the size of the other. I have grown accustom to icing my knee everyday after workouts and at home at night. I take Advil almost every day now and its becoming manageable. I also started taking glucosamine pills and have now moved on to the "joint juice". So far so good.

Stretching has been tough, but I am doing it. With my knee, I haven't been able to kneel on the ground and stretch out my quads the way I used to- it hurts to much to out my weight down like that. But I am trying to rest my foot on something behind me and bend like that to stretch out the front of my quads. It does the job for the most part. I cant wait to re-incorporate my Yoga class into this as X-training on Thursdays.

I'm doing my best to stay on point- even on business trips. I was in Las Vegas last Wed- Fri and convinced a co-worker of mine to go for a walk jog from our hotel (RIO) to the strip, down and back at 8am. It ended up being 3.87 miles and it made the rest of the day so much better.

So who knows where this journey will take me (aside from 6th and Figueroa on 5/25). I hear only 3% of the world's population ever finish a marathon. I have a half and a full one set for 2009. I am sure once I finish that, that the little critical voice in my head, will have some competition from the self assured, confident one I am building now.

This is just the beginning...